Private Needing A Hand Or Two

[Alina Tremiru]

She rolled her eyes a little. Darth Strosius was as humble as always. Something for them to work on, hopefully. She'd keep his hand in hers until they were closer to the academy. Alina stopped them just out of sight by ducking into an alley. "So, this, between us. People can use it against us. I don't care if people find out, but what do you think? What do you want?" With him usually hiding his face behind a mask, it'd make sense if he wanted to hide this.

She watched in silence, her eyes glancing between his again and again. Really, she didn't want to have to hide it, but they were acolytes. Worse, there were enemies everywhere these days. The concern in her eyes was very real. She didn't want to put him at risk.

 

[Darth Strosius]

He was confused when she stopped, even more so when she had pulled him into an alley. Her question absolutely dumbfounded him however. His immediate reaction was to say that he was fine with everyone and their mother knowing, but he hesitated as he stared right back at her. Alina Tremiru did make a good point, they were each other's weaknesses now. Someone could use him to get to her and vice versa, and that thought was troubling indeed. Finally, after a few long moments of silence he spoke.

"Alina. I have followed you from planet to planet, whether it be chasing holocrons or hunting Sangnir I'm always here for you. If the cost of being...together like this is a little bit more danger, then I'm fine with it." Alisteri was surprisingly confident as he spoke, and the look in his eyes was very serious. He idly ran his thumb over the back of her hand as he glanced to look at their intertwined fingers. "I...I care about you. I care about you more than any other. And I don't care if only the two of us know it, or if everyone from here to Coruscant knows it. I'm prepared to face whatever would break us apart."

 

[Alina Tremiru]

Her eyes widened. The thought that Darth Strosius would say what he did hadn't even crossed her mind. This was still so new. And they still so weak as Sith. The danger of being used as weapons against each other was always there. It didn't matter how strong she'd gotten. Either of them could be snuffed out. Though, that just made her want to be with him more. The fact he was so confident in this made her want this more. Her gaze fell to his hand, watching his thumb.

All to hide the intense blush that had formed.

"I.. There's no one I trust more. Promise me you'll get stronger. That you won't die. I don't want to loose this. Loose you. .. Okay?"

 

[Darth Strosius]

He blinked in surprise at her response, quick to nod even as his own face began growing red again. Making Alina Tremiru blush rather than the other way around was odd, but the fluttery feeling that it caused him was more than nice. "I promise...I promise that I'll get stronger for you." Alisteri did have asmall laugh though, idly pressing his forehead against hers. "I am very hard to kill Alina, and that was before I could regrow body parts."

There was a small pause as his eyes closed though, his voice moving to more of a whisper. "I promise that I won't be lost, and I promise that you won't either. We'll be too strong to take down someday, just think of it."

 

[Alina Tremiru]

Alina's eyes closed the moment Darth Strosius set his forehead against hers. The two of them, powerful. Together. It was a wonderful thought. She slipped her hand from his so she could snake her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. It was all she could think to do. It'd be minutes before she finally spoke again, just in a small whisper.

"Can you stay with me? Tonight?"

 

[Darth Strosius]

As if it were just a reaction, his arms slipped around her waist to hug her back. He had barely registered that he did it for a moment, it just seemed so natural to do. Had he been told that he and Alina Tremiru would be this close only a day ago, Alisteri would've laughed. Now though, it was like he could hardly remember when he hadn't wanted the two of them to hug like this. His eyes opened at the question and he offered her a small smile. "Of course, just as long as you don't turn the shower on me to wake me up again."

 

[Alina Tremiru]

A soft smile formed and her eyes opened too. Alina watched Darth Strosius for a moment longer. There was an obvious hesitation before she pulled away to once more take his hand. She said nothing as she pulled him along. Not bothering to let go of his hand even as they entered the academy. Whatever danger this brought, she wouldn't hide it in fear. She was happy, and there was no way she was going to let that go. Once back in her room she nodded to the bathroom.

"I won't tell you where to sleep, but my beds much more comfortable than a tub." It was pretty obvious she was trying to be coy, but it sounded more like she was hoping he'd actually join her. Once more she felt her cheeks heat up. This was far from the first time she'd had someone in her room, but Alisteri was so vastly different. It was constantly catching her off guard. She didn't want to do too much. Didn't want to scare him away. She thought she'd figured out his limits, but she couldn't be anymore wrong.

 

[Darth Strosius]

Alisteri did his best not to look too disappointed as Alina Tremiru pulled away, but he was satisfied with walking back with her hand in hand. There was not an ounce of hesitation or shame as he followed her through the academy, if anything he seemed to be a bit bolder in his stride than usual. He cared little for who saw them, he had his doubts that he would be recognized without his mask anyway. Not that it would've mattered of course.

Once they had made it back to her room however, her remark made his face turn to a bright red. He cleared his throat as he tried to recompose himself, his gaze firmly fixed on the floor for a few moments as he struggled to try and find a response. Finally he did speak, but he didn't look back at her. "...I will only accept cuddling, anything else and I'll sleep in the shower..." He muttered under his breath, a bright blush still very evident on his face. Usually he wouldn't have accepted, but a bed sounded wonderful.

 

[Alina Tremiru]

Alina took her time to respond. Mostly because Darth Strosius was looking away and the clothing she usually slept in certainly wasn't what she was wearing now. So she took the moment of silence to get changed. And think. Truthfully she hadn't even expected cuddling to be on the table. There was some mild amusement at just how reversed the roles seemed to be between them. Look at any romance flick. When she was done changing she stepped up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist and hiding her face in his back.

"That's fine with me."

 

[Darth Strosius]

Alisteri kept his gaze on the other side of the room as Alina Tremiru changed, idly glancing over his own clothes as he waited. By now he had gotten used to sleeping in just about any attire, frequently traveling on ships without a bed to sleep in just did that. Not to mention sleeping on battlefields of course. He had even fallen asleep in his usual combat outfit on multiple occasions, mask included.

He jumped slightly in surprise as she wrapped her arms around his waist, but he settled down quickly as she spoke. "Ah, glad we're in agreement then..." A part of him was starting to regret his decision, he could only imagine trying to get to sleep with her right there next to him.

 

[Alina Tremiru]

Alina stayed for far longer than she needed to. It was odd, feeling her own clothing, but there was something to feeling his warmth. She liked it. After a moment she finally moved back, heading towards her bed. She didn't try and make Darth Strosius follow her this time. She just sat on the edge of her bed, watching him. Waiting for whatever he might decide.

 

[Darth Strosius]

Alisteri hesitated for just one moment before he followed Alina Tremiru to her bed, idly wishing that he had his mask on to hide his face. He could feel the heat on his face as he sat down next to her, glancing at her before leaning back and laying down on the bed with a relaxed sigh. "You're right, this is more comfortable than the shower." And a good bit more comfortable than Saket's floor.

 

[Alina Tremiru]

It wasn't long after that Alina laid beside him, though she kept her hands to herself. She didn't want to make him leave to the tub, how much was okay? A frown formed on her lips as her eyes stayed up on the ceiling. It was never something she had to worry about. Most people couldn't hold themselves back around her, but Darth Strosius was vastly different. "I do make sure I have the best beds. Sleep is important." She paused.

"And hard to get. Do you ever have nightmares?"

 

[Darth Strosius]

Alisteri was content with simply staring up at the ceiling and letting the silence reign, letting out a hum of agreement. Her question made him fall back into silence again. "...Yeah...." His voice was low, hesitant. As if there was more to his answer. Finally his gaze shifted to look at Alina Tremiru before she could respond to him however. "Do you?"

 

[Alina Tremiru]

"Every night. Different things. The Graug. When I lost my arms. The first time my mother tried to kill me." She listed it off some of the nightmares she had, but they weren't all of them. Just the most prevalent. Alina's eyes never left the ceiling. Her eyes narrowed a little. Anger at herself. A Sith shouldn't be plagued by fear, but she was. Constantly. It made her angry. "Usually I can drink it away. Hell, usually I take someone home to make me forget all this for a couple hours. I'm.." Her voice trailed off. For the first time in a long time she felt weak.

The young woman turned on her side towards Darth Strosius , but she didn't look at him. She couldn't. She was embarrassed at just how pathetic she was. Her eyes were wet with tears, her cheeks red from that anger and shame. "No matter how strong I get, I'm still so pathetic. I can't save anyone." Even though she got her arms back, it didn't erase what happened. She was too weak to keep them in the first place. She gripped the sheet just in front of her face, watching her hand move.

Making sure it really was there. The weeks spend without them made it hard to believe. She let every wall she'd ever put up down. She was desperate to be able to. And that only made her feel more pathetic. She didn't want to feel alone and scared. And Alisteri was someone she could really trust. It was overwhelming. Like suffocating. Actually suffocating. No, wait. She hadn't even realized it, but she was crying. The realization only made it worse. Alina curled up on herself, now hiding her face into the sheets.

 

[Darth Strosius]

He sat silently as she listed off various things, idly wincing at all of them. He could understand that, to some extent anyway. Sleep had always escaped him, even before he became a Sith. His time as a Sith had given him far more stuff to have nightmares about of course, but that just made them more...interesting. Their frequency had remained the same.

At least now he got to have nightmares about the Graug rather than losing his eye...as often anyway.

Alisteri glanced at Alina Tremiru as she spoke again, sparing another wince in regards to her apparent 'coping' mechanisms. He personally preferred training and meditation to drinking and...well that, but he wasn't about to say anything of course. When she turned over however, and she had evidently been crying or was starting to cry, he felt his heart wrench to a stop for a moment. His eyes were wide as he watched her, holding himself back from just reaching out to comfort her in some way. Reluctantly he waited, allowing her to curl up before he struck and wrapped his arms around her protectively. He pulled her close, gently pressing a kiss to her forehead.

"Shh...now now, why say something that isn't true?" His voice was surprisingly calm given how nervous he was, and he spoke in as much of a soothing tone as he could muster. He had to comfort her, no mistakes.

"You are not pathetic. Lest you forget that you are Alina, Acolyte of the Sith, newborn Sangnir, slayer of Graug and owner of my heart." Comforting others was a new one for sure, he wasn't even used to being comforted himself. He could only hope that whatever he was doing was helping in some way. Otherwise...well seeing her like this just broke his heart. "I...I don't know if it helps any but...that nap that we took on the way to Nar Shaddaa, that was the first dreamless sleep I've had in years." His voice cracked at that admission, but he continued. "Had it not been for you, do you know where I would be? Alone. Just one eye, one hand, and never having shown my face to anyone except my master. No friends...no you...I would be just another Acolyte in line to die for the Sith."

 

[Alina Tremiru]

There was no fighting him off. She didn't want to. For the first time since she was young she wanted someone else to help her. Not just anyone. Darth Strosius . She pressed her face into his chest, openly sobbing. She didn't hold anything back. The hate, the fear. The helplessness. Her hands shifted to instead grip at his shirt instead of the sheets. Knuckles white. Alina was shaking. His words were comforting, more than he could ever know, but she couldn't bring herself to tell him that. Not right now.

She just wanted to be held, and the fact he was willing to hold her like this was everything she needed. He didn't have to say anything, but he was. She wouldn't calm for a while. And when the crying did finally come to an end, it was only because she passed out. Even asleep she still looked upset, but her grip on Alisteri's shirt never loosened.

 

[Darth Strosius]

By now Alisteri had resorted to simply whispering the occasional compliment or word of assurance as he held her, idly running his hand through her hair in an attempt to soothe her. As much as it hurt him to hear, he knew that just letting her cry it out was probably the best way to go. Get it all out of her system while he was there for her, even though he could barely stand the sound of her crying.

He had no idea how long he and Alina Tremiru were laying there, but by the time he realized that she had stopped crying she had already been asleep for a few minutes. A small sigh of relief left him, more for her sake than his, as he gently kissed her forehead again as he pulled the covers over them. He didn't dare let go of her though, almost as if he was afraid that she would slip away if his arms ever fully left her. It didn't take all that long for him to fall asleep either, still holding her securely in his arms.

 

[Alina Tremiru]

It was a thankfully, and surprisingly, restful sleep for Alina. No nightmares, no dreams. Just much needed sleep that she hadn't truly had since she lost her arms. At least, she didn't remember her dream. The young woman slowly woke up in the next morning, her eyes opening to see another person. It was a bit startling at first. For all her sleeping around she never let them stay. Her gaze drifted up as she started to remember who it was. Darth Strosius . He stayed. Even after she broke down.

The faintest smile formed as she watched him sleep. Everything he said went through her mind again, though there was one thing in particular that stood out. "Owner of your heart.." With every thing they'd gone through together, war, adventure, hardship, and triumph, it wasn't as surprising to hear as she thought it would be. He couldn't even kiss her yet, but he felt that strongly. And Alina didn't doubt him in the slightest.

A hand reached up to gently stroke his cheek. What he said wasn't surprising. But this was. Having him here, asleep. Whole. It wasn't something she'd think would ever happen. He didn't even want improved cybernetics, but here he was. And she couldn't be happier.

 

[Darth Strosius]

Evidently, Alisteri had a rather restful sleep as well. He was used to waking up multiple times in the middle of the night, usually covered in sweat and occasionally screaming as well. His few dreamless sleeps were usually out of exhaustion or occasionally pain, but Alina Tremiru seemed to be on that list now as well. Twice that he had slept near her, and twice his sleep went undisturbed. Good to know.

He didn't seem to react to her touch, his breathing still steady as if he had no idea that she was awake. Which to be fair, he didn't. Not yet anyway. He couldn't sleep forever though, but his eyes did settle on a nice sight as they slowly cracked open. A small smile grew on his face as he blinked awake, one of his hands coming up to run through her hair. "Alina..." However, that seemed to trigger a realization. That was that he was in bed with her, their faces right next to each other, and with her hand resting on his cheek.

Suffice to say that his face soon lit up a bright shade of red. "Uh, m-morning..."