A small smirk perched itself in the corner of the young introvert's mouth as his typically restless eyes honed in on one phrase that stuck out to him in the book he was reading. "Sometimes things don't go as we plan for them to. Yet, even if they did, our lives would remain a tangled mess woven into the tapestry of everything else that makes us seem so small.", he whispered to himself, silently reveling in those carefully collaborated words for the time being as he tried to place himself in the moment that the writer had been in while he'd been releasing his thoughts to the page. There was no way he could have ever been that connected or immersed, however, and he knew it, despite his need to deeply understand the one who'd written them.
It was frustrating to realize that no matter what he read or how he read it, he would still be lacking some source of the material in some way. He'd never be able to feel what the writers felt the moment they decided to share a bit of themselves, nor would he ever be able to understand their mindset or grasp their knowledge on the subjects being eluded to. It felt like he wasn't getting all of the variables to an equation he desperately wished to solve, and it bothered him to no end that he couldn't fully place himself in the moments he could only imagine being in. Something that had always bothered him at least a little bit, though now more than ever. So, as he cursed inwardly about his momentary dilemma, he finally reached a moment of understanding that he would never be able to grasp everything. That was part of what made the galaxy the incredible thing that it was. The questions and uncertainties that were constantly dwelling deep within waiting to be solved by minds constantly churning in search of all of those answers were part of why he was there in the first place. He was a thinker. He was a problem solver. He was capable of wisdom. He was capable of great things, just as every living being with ambition was. He had a choice to make, however, and that choice was a daunting, bothersome thing. Something he had been avoiding, as of late, and that was who he was going to be.
He'd been provided a gift in the force, and that meant that he was capable of great things. Of helping people through incredible feats that should have been impossible, yet some who were gifted by a kiss from the force were also in near constant danger, many of whom died young in the pursuit of protecting the innocent and maintaining a balance in the force. It was something he felt he had to do because he had been so gifted, yet something that he also knew would keep him from honing his mind the way that he might if he were allowed to become a philosopher surrounded by columns of books and data or a scientist who's lab waited upon his each and every discovery. If he studied with the Jedi and sought to become a protector above all else, though, it meant that he would never be the other things that he had aspired to be once upon a time. As a flicked the book closed, though, he glanced back over at the gathering of Jedi who were all sharing in a social event the likes of which many of them needed, he finally understood that perhaps he didn't want all of that time alone that research and discovery would require. Perhaps he'd outgrown some of that need for understanding. Perhaps he didn't need to know every answer to every question asked. Perhaps he'd found his calling. Perhaps helping people was what he'd truly wanted, regardless of his carnal need to understand the things that bound the galaxy together. Maybe that was all he'd needed after all. To know that people were the bindings he'd been searching for. To know that family and friends were the constantly churning gears of the galaxy.
As he pushed himself up from the fountain's edge he saw a pair of birds sharing a stone bench about fifteen feet away, and so he tore his second piece of bread and flipped the pieces over towards the ground in front of the bench, watching as both of them hopped down and began to pick at the bread he'd offered. A smile found his face, seeing their elation, and as he tucked the book into his back pocket he headed back over towards the gathering of gifted individuals, no longer interested in his solitude for now.
"Looks good.", he offered to no one in particular, smiling still as he heard playful and joking comment passed back and forth which warranted laughter in response that warmed his heart. Then, and only after practically everyone had been served, he found himself a plate and began inching his way down the line as one of the last to get a plate of food, though there seemed to be no shortage of options even by then.