The beauty in Life and Death. (Joza Perl)

[Kenrath]

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Marcus Nichols stood watching the fights from one of the higher perches of the Arena. The Sith Lord known to most mostly concealed in dark robes his face hidden stood right up at the edge so he could look down and see everything. His arms clasped behind his back. Underneath he wore simple leather armor not much different than the more armored of the Gladiator's he now stood watching. In truth he envied these men,,,,,,,,,,,,,these warriors.


It is why he was intent on building one just it for the would be Sith he sought to train in the arts of combat. This was where men were forged into warriors......unstoppable killing machines that would devastate all who opposed them. He even considered approaching some of the day's victors to bring them out of the bowels of this very place and take them back to the Empire.

As he watched with a keen two men slash and hack at each other he reached grabbing a cup on the table beside him and taking a drink. He was so engrossed in the sight before him that he almost missed the presence that joined him in that section of the stands. A familiar presence that stood out among the others around him. He did not turn away instead letting her speak to him wondering if she would remember him from the single encounter on Lothal. Just because it was memorable for him didn't necessarily mean it was for her.

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza certainly didn’t look the part of someone who would be interested in seeing a death match, and in truth she probably wasn’t. But her curiosity had gotten the better of her as she meandered through the crowds to find a decent view, eyes consistently flickering back to the two warriors as they went at each other like their lives depended on it. And they likely did, considering what she’d heard about these sorts of arenas. Never put myself in something like that…if it can be helped. She had to wonder what pushed someone into a primal killing rage like that, after all. She’d felt the surge of battle before as she fought for her life, but never would she enter into a situation so willingly…right?

The Zeltron was broken from her thoughts as she felt a familiar presence in the force, brows knitting as she couldn’t easily identify it. It was definitely someone she felt before, but couldn’t attach any immediate feelings to. Still, the Knight continued to move cautiously as she followed the feeling. She wanted to know who it was, who would come here. And then, as her eyes landed on the back of his hood, memories came rushing back. Lothal, when she was just a Padawan. Confused, anxious and angry, he’d somehow coaxed her into fighting him. Well, getting her ass handed to her by him. Wasn’t much of a fight.

Briefly, she mused of how things would be different this time around. If they would be different. Just because she’d grown into her skill as a force user didn’t mean that his ability hadn’t increased as well. Still, she had no intent on starting a fight this time around.

“This is the sort of place you’d be.” She slipped into the seat beside him, idly running a hand though her hair as she fixed her gaze on the fight going on below. “Taking a break and watching someone beat someone else to death for a change?” She almost flashed him a smile, but instead leaned back in her chair. She wondered if he’d actually remember her, them having met quite some time ago.

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

He smiled under the hood as she spoke but did not yet turn around.

"The question is not why am I here but why are you here?" "Not exactly the proper place for a Jedi to be hanging around now is it."

He closed his eyes feeding off of the torment crashing into him from her like a wave against the rocks. He smirked knowing her thoughts even if she herself were still trying to figure him out. Almost as if to answer her question he let the few blocks holding back the exact amount of power he had gained and now held since their last meeting fall away as his own wave of dark side energy crashed back towards her.

Slowing turning he moved to face her the Sith Lord's eyes more of a redish orange than the soft yellow they were when they first met. When his eyes met hers a look of pleasant surprise flashed in them.

"Well well well my little morsel is all grown up now." "I don't know whether to be impressed or turned on."

He moved from the edge to slip in behind her. His movements were slow and methodical. If she didn't move he would place his hands lightly on her shoulders and lean in to whisper in her ear.

"If I had wanted you dead my little morsel I will have killed you that day."

He stood back up completing the circle around her and moving back up to the edge to watch the fight a moment longer.

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Crossing her arms over her chest, she shrugged with a roll of her shoulders. “I don’t like to be called “Jedi” any more.” She didn’t offer much of an explanation, but he’d be able to feel that her presence wasn’t as pure and erratic as their first meeting. She’d become calmer and more composed over the years, but still not exactly sage-like. Still, she held on to her caution and didn’t try to hide the instinctive threads of fear that ran through her mind. She’d found that against Sith it was useless, especially those that outclassed her in power.

She froze for a second as she felt his dark sided energy overtake her being, but after a moment she exhaled, centering herself and letting her feel his dark presence. Ever since her encounter with the Sith Priestess, she’d found something oddly alluring about the dark side. Not that she intended to cross that line anytime soon, but what was the point in resisting a little decadence from time to time? If she didn’t allow herself even this, Joza would have likely fallen with no control a long time ago.

She hummed softly at his remark, green eyes meeting his own as she returned his look with a curious stare of her own. But when he slipped behind her, she felt her breath hitch in her throat for a moment and didn’t move, not wanting to see if she could out maneuver him in a place like this. She hesitated as she felt his hands touch her shoulders, skin tingling at the contact but she reigned herself in.

“I know.” She murmured back, closing her eyes for a moment. He certainly could have, as untrained and anxious as she’d been. It would have been easy.

“But you didn’t.” A smirk flickered to and from her face as he moved back to his original position to observe the fight. Taking in a deep breath, she let it out slowly. “Do you think that letting me live was a mistake?”

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

He chuckled.

"You are not Sith which makes you a Jedi." "Balance is a lie Joza, just ask Keira Ticon."

He turned and faced her pulling his hood down.

"Killing you was never the goal I do however regret not being able to accomplish what I had intended to." "My goal was to experience the pleasure of having a Zeltron..to see if it........... you taste as sweet as the rumors say you do." "Unfortunately I ran out of time and the last thing I needed was to get caught on a Jedi world taking such liberties with one of their Padawan's."

He knew he was being too blatantly forward with her but she had asked. He held a hand out to her to entice her to come up to the edge by his side.

"You didn't answer my question though." "Why are you here?" "What drew you to such a place as this knowing your Jedi Masters would not approve of indulging in such decadence behavior?" "More importantly would you like to know why I am here?"

He paused for a moment giving her a smile a beckoning nod of his head.

"Come on....don't be afraid." "I told you, if I wanted you dead you would be." "Aren't you even a little bit curious to look into the abyss that is a Sith's mind?"

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Balance. Joza didn’t really think of herself as such, and still she wasn’t even sure what she was trying to do. But the talk of alignment always tended to confuse her so, she shrugged her shoulders. “If that’s what you see me as,”

When he removed his hood and revealed his true intent behind their first meeting, she couldn’t keep her eyes from widening in surprise. A scoff of disappointment followed as she shook her head. “So your true aim was to take advantage of me?” she tilted her head to the side, a hard look in her eyes. “Honestly, I’ve found it surprising that you haven’t experienced one of my kind. Why not just go to Zeltros and have your fill? Some Zeltron women would certainly jump at the chance to be a handsome Sith’s plaything.” It was true, she could name a few women off the top of her head that craved dangerous erotic encounters.

Yet still, she moved to his side when he offered for her to, still afraid though her fear manifested itself into curiosity rather than blind anger. She rested an elbow on the edge and glanced down at the fight below, trying to gather her thoughts. “I’m here because I wanted to see what sort of feeling watching two men trying to kill each other gave me.” She answered honestly, clearing her throat. “I thought that you being here was obvious. But I guess it’s not?” She arched a brow at him.

“What do you mean ‘look into your mind’?” She asked slowly, a note of caution in her voice.

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

He smiled as she rested her elbow on the edge.

"Taking advantage of you would insinuate that you didn't want it on even a subconscious level." "Despite the lies we tell ourselves in the mirror we are instinctual creatures."

He paused.

"Not just any woman would do and I think you know that even if you don't want to." "Sure I could go to Zeltros any time I want and get whatever I desire handed to me on a silver platter." "But what would be the fun in that?"

He turned facing her leaning back against the wall.

"You on the other hand with your cautious nature and second guessing are a conquest worth pursuing." "The endless internal struggle of the heart and the mind." "Your body saying yes while your mind screams what a bad idea it is." "To pit self preservation against carnal desire."

He smirked running a hand through her hair before glancing towards the fight and then back.

"You are focusing on the wrong thing little morsel." "On yourself instead of the men who fight.."

He finally turned back to the fighters watching even as he continued to talk.

"I admire and even envy them for the simplicity of their lives." "No care in the world, no politics, no theoretical or philosophical debate, no right or wrong." "Only the beauty in life or death." "Look at them Joza...............they are more free than you and I will ever be." "Sure one or two are probably criminals or slaves."

Vengeance pointed to the one on the right at the moment he was pointing.

"That one however.....watch how he moves look at the calm determination in his body language." "He is here of his own free will." "He chose this...not because he enjoys killing but because he like a lot of others live to test the measure of a man." "So that he himself may be called a man not for his ability to kill but to survive against all odds."

He paused a smile forming on his lips.

"Tell me something............that day on Lothal what did you do when I left?" "Did you wallow in defeat?" "Or did you nurse your wounds and then train...train like you have never trained before." "Trained towards the goal of never feeling defeat like you did that day." "Not to seek revenge but to seek improvement in yourself"

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

She couldn’t help but click her tongue during his pause. “Are you sure those are not just the words of a man trying to rationalize his ill behavior towards women?” She challenge, having heard similar words before in regards to both herself and other woman. It was a thin line, tricky to walk.

Her eyes narrowed as he continued and she pursed her lips, looking displeased. Partially because of him insinuating that she wanted to give in to her baser desires, and partially because he had a point. He’d verbalized her own thoughts and internal struggles that she’d been having since that day on Voss where she gave in to her carnal urges after a mental battle that she didn’t fight hard enough in. Thus, it started a spiral where she’d gradually stop resisting so much and just gave in. It was easier, wasn’t it?

“So I’m a conquest now? Great.” An eye roll signaled her irritation, but she didn’t let herself be overtaken by it. Instead she bit her lip to keep herself centered and her thoughts out of the gutter. “Yeah, I’ve been though that song and dance before.” She shrugged, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible. But damn was he right. “But a lay is just a lay, at the end of the night.”

She frowned as he ran a hand though her hair but didn’t move to stop him, instead allowing herself to enjoy the feeling just a tiny bit. She wasn’t as obviously vulnerable this time around, appearing much more guarded. But the caution was still present, the second guessing he’d mentioned. It was in her nature.

Her gaze followed his hand as it pointed back to the fighters in the arena. For a few moments, she watched them fight set to Vengeance’s narrative. In a way, it reminded her of the “fight” they’d had on Lothal, and she winced. One was desperate and wild, moving erratically while the other was calm and collected, easily taking control of the fight.

Turning back to him, she bit the inside of her cheek at his question and figured it would be best if she didn’t answer. Silence dropped between them for nearly a minute before she went back on it and decided to speak. “Well…” She spoke slowly, trying to form the words she wanted to say. “I’ve been defeated many times over since then, but none were like that day.” She rested her other elbow on the edge and clasped her hands together, staring down at the fist they formed. “Combat is probably only the Jedi aspect that I’ve actually nailed down. I’ve been in more fights than I can count by now, but that’s not really an accomplishment. What is an accomplishment is the fact that I’ve survived thus far, I suppose.” She raised her head and glanced over at him. “And your introduction to Makashi seemed to be the start of it all.”

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

Vengeance smirked.

"Only a man ashamed of what he is tries to rationalize his actions." "I could sit here and try to convince you and myself that I am a nice, sweet, romantic gentlemen looking to woo the woman of his dreams to a life of cookouts in white fenced in yards." "It would be a lie though." "I am and always have been more the angry, violent, tearing clothes and destroying rooms sex that lingers in your mind and on your body long after the sun rises."

He smirked.

"If a lay is just a lay at the end of the night you have obviously been doing something wrong."

He smiled softly.

"You know I am right........just don't want to admit it." "The silence, the impact of that defeat, and your actions since then prove it." "You think that by admitting it, by saying it out loud will someone make you less of a person."

He turned back to the fight just as the fighter he was using to support the discussion slice his opponent from stem to sternum.

"Little Morsel there is no shame in admitting you share some camaraderie with that man there." "Thanks to me you have shared a similar path." "A path that largely made me what I am today..........more specifically six years being beaten and tortured by Sith Overseers."

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

A scowl flashed across her face when he mentioned that she must be doing something wrong, but she shook it off after a few seconds. She shook her head after he smiled at her, and huffed softly.

“So what if you’re right? That doesn’t mean that I’m going to give in to anything.” She wasn’t above admitting that he had a point, but she still retained some of the same childish aspect she’d displayed during their first meeting. She was stubborn with her view, or so she tried to appear. Glancing over to him, she raised a brow. “Giving in to your primal urges and emotions is a very Sith thing to do, is it not?”

She followed his gaze back to the fight and frowned. “I don’t think we’re all that similar, really.” She was aware that different paths could lead to the same outcome, but in her mind there was still a thick divide between Jedi and Sith…even though she didn’t know where she stood in reference to that line. “If they hurt you so much, then why choose the Sith? There are other ways to obtain power.” She didn’t sound bitter in asking, moreso curious as to his viewpoints.

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

Vengeance chuckled slipping around behind her and wrapping an arm around her waist. His touch was gentle and playful as he whispered to her.

"My sweet sweet Morsel you have already given in........time and time again." "That day on Lothal, and it sounds like multiple times since then."

He chuckled softly still holding on to her.

"Giving in to primal urges and emotions is a Zeltron thing to do as well from what I hear."

He wrapped his other arm around her squeezing her softly.

"Why because they kill to survive?" "Because they live every moment of their life like it is their last."

He smile letting go of her and turning her around to face him.

"I didn't choose the Sith Joza." "I was simply born on a Sith Controlled world and taken by them when my father was murdered." "It was never about power but survival." "And besides I have more scars from Jedi than I do Sith."

His hand went up to caress her cheek with a smile.

"We all have our demons little Morsel." "The deference is people like me, people like those men down there face them head on." "So do you and much like the people you claim to have nothing in common with here you are standing here staring one of yours in the face."

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza’s breath hitched in her throat but she did not jump in surprise as Vengeance snuck behind her and swiftly wrapped an arm around her waist. Instinctively, her hand went to grasp his hand where it rested against her but she did not try and remove him. Instead, she simply squeezed it for a brief moment. Neither of them were being hostile, and she figured that this was just the way he was—teasing as it may be. Still, she didn’t let down her guard, conscious of the location of her saber hilts.

“True.” She shot back. “I won’t deny that I’ve given in to my baser desires before. Once I was out from under the watchful eye of my Master, there wasn’t much holding me back.” She felt as if she shouldn’t be sharing this with him, but what did she have to lose? He’d already figured her out, after all. “But that doesn’t mean that I can’t have some self-restraint every once in a while.” She paused as his other arm snaked around her waist and he squeezed. Though the physical act wasn’t uncomfortable, she felt a small fire begin to burn in her chest.

Thankfully he’d let her go and she let out a visible exhale, clearly a little frustrated as she ran a hand through her hair from the crown to the mid-section. “You’re wrong.” She muttered, simply to be confrontational. “There’s a line. I can hold myself back if I want to. And…I don’t have any demons to face. I can handle myself.” She sounded more like she was trying to convince herself rather than him.

“You’re awfully handsy.” She grunted, placing her hand atop his and removing it from her cheek.

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

Vengeance laughed.

"Restraint my dear Morsel is the only reason you are still wearing clothes."

His hand firmly clamped around her fingers when she removed his hand from her cheek. While firm it was not meant to cause pain. His eyes did blaze an internal fire of desire almost as if to prove there was a different between restraint and pretending something didn't exist.

"What is the purpose of lines if not to cross them?"

A finger of his free hand gently tapped her temple.

"I am not talking about actual demons you can fight with a saber but the ones in your mind..................."

He moved to gently place his hand flat on her chest where her heart is unless she stopped him.

".................and in your heart." "The ones that caused the internal turmoil between what feels good and what is appropriate."

He smiled not moving his hand if still touching her.

"Your heart screams of desire but your mind says I am a Sith and you should resist." "Your heart knows that while I am not gentle that I will not harm you......but your mind says I am the devil you should fear and guard against."

He leaned in to whisper to her.

"The job of a Master is not to hinder but to cultivate the strengths of their student." "You are beautiful and deadly." "The Jedi would cloister you away in meditation to suppress your urges." "To burden you with rules and regulations." "I want simply the same thing I have wanted since the very beginning." "To unleash you, to taste the sweet nectar of your loins, and then teach you to defend or kill on your own terms for your own reasons." "To hold a person's life in your hands and let your own views decide their fate." "You have a rebellious nature Joza........once such things are no longer forbidden you will realize the desire to do them all day every day will lessen and the restraint becomes as natural as breathing."

He looked up as new fighters entered the arena his lips still by her ear.

"Much like those men down there do each and every day."

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Her eyes narrowed, unamused when he grasped at her hand. She watched him carefully, and maybe she should have pulled away when his hand lay flat against her chest right over her heart. She shouldn’t have let him touch her at all to begin with, but she hadn’t been very resistant and he kept finding ways to. It wasn’t as if she didn’t want it either—she could feel her breathing begin to quicken ever so slightly, and her chest flushed under his touch. But it wasn’t as if she had the mind to vocalize these sorts of things. Though, he knew already.

“I…” Whatever she was going to say faded in the face of his words, and she knew them to be true. She’d struggled with her natural urges, feeling shamed of having them. Acting on them had not reduced the shame at all, but rather drove a wedge between her and the purely lightsided, wholesome being she aspired to be. But the more she thought about it, would obtaining such an ideal really be worth it? The only time she felt truly free was in the throes of ecstasy, but there was no pride in that. At least, not to her.

“Giving up would make me weak.” She yanked her hand out of his grip, but oddly didn’t move away or try and swat away his other hand at her chest. “I’ve indulged in the Sith before but I haven’t been pulled under.” She paused, her breath hitching in her throat for a short moment a she fought to smother the flames of desire that rose in her chest. “And I don’t intend to.”

As a new set of warriors entered the arena, she took in a deep breath and took his hand firmly by the wrist, attempting to remove it from her chest before taking a step back. Her eyes glanced at the newcomers, before moving back towards him. “I’m not going to be seduced by you.” It was said more to herself than to him, but with the way her eyes hardened, she seemed to mean it. But her mind swirled, entertaining the possibility.

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

Vengeance smirked turning around facing the table behind them to pick up his until that moment disregarded drink.

"You are far from weak Joza and acknowledging what you are and how you feel doesn't make one weak but wise."

He shook his head still facing away from her.

"Pulling under is not what we do..........we teach you to rise above it." "The Jedi have you convinced we are all mindless, soulless husks running around raping. pillaging, and murdering without thought or care of the consequences."

He finally turned back around the drink in his hand.

"Sure some are but not all." "We teach you to free yourself from burdens that weigh us down in our minds and in our hearts?" "To embrace what life as to offer."

He paused with a smile after a minute taking a seat and kicking his feet up on the chair.

"Not going to be seduced by me little Morsel?" "You already have...........twice." "Think about it....what do you remember more from our first encounter the beating or me?" "Face it bruises heal, aches fade away but the person who caused the sticks in our minds." "The fact that you did not lash out when you found me here today....didn't try to seek revenge for what I did you means on some level you are appreciative of it."

He took a sip of his drink before he continued.

"Then we have the obvious second time happening right this moment." "The funny thing about arousal is no matter how hard to try to hide it no matter how many layers of clothing you put on it always seeps through." "Even with you fighting your instincts." "You want to feel the passion again but you fight the tender touches."

He smirked.

"My hands on your cheek or through your hair plays to your Jedi side...a side you have been raging against for some time now it seems." "The bias teachings of the Jedi make such actions from a Sith seem foreign to you and on some level inappropriate." "But my arms around you holding you close makes you feel warm and secure....protected from all the bad things in the galaxy." "My hand against your chest makes you feel beautiful and desired......makes you feel like a woman." "Coming from a sith like me seems like the world in balance.....the bad boy vibe you test out but would never take home to mamma."

He smiled.

"The truth is Joza I am not one or the other but something in between." "Not only that but I have all the time in the Galaxy." "This day like the first will stick in your mind." "The little things that didn't used to will remind you of me." "The next philosophical debate you find yourself in my words will echo in your mind." "You may even find yourself speaking them as if they were your own." "Even if you don't seek me out of your own free will the Force will do it for you." "It seems to love to torment us both that way." "Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not a week from now but in a month, in a year we will bump into each other again."

He took a sip of his drink.

"And when it happens once again your mind will scream a thousand different thoughts as a dozen different emotions flood through you." "You will ask yourself should you flee, should you attack, or much like today should you engage in conversation." "Will the next time be different.....will you give in to the desire.........will you long to feel my hands on your flesh, my arms around you?" "Maybe something more?"

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

As he spoke, Joza kept her back turned to him. She wanted to appear as if she was watching the match below, but didn’t bother to try and seem vested in it beyond idly watching the pair of warriors dance back and forth. It served as a fitting backdrop to this conversation, and she began to wonder why he’d bothered with her at all. Was he just looking to get her clothes off, or did he see some sort of potential within the young Zeltron? Philosophical debates aside, she was having trouble organizing her thoughts.

“I’ve heard Sith defectors speak of how the dark side only binds you in chains. Makes you a slave to your own emotions. Isn’t that something you dark siders often try and pitch? How the darkness freed you from the chains of the Jedi?” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, eyes still following the fighters below in the arena. “Is that why many Sith-in-training fail to survive their training?” She turned to face him now, her eyes glinting with curiosity as she spoke from an academic perspective rather than one of suspicion.

“Not by going to the light, of course,” There was a sting of bitterness in her voice as she continued, but it faded just as quickly as it came. “But from the harsh training of an Acolyte?” She tilted her head towards him as if to indicate his earlier struggles. “Is it because they lose control of their desires rather than harnessing them?” It was clear that she’d become interested in the theory behind Sith. If she was going to be against something, it was worth it to try and at least understand why they saw things the way they did.

When the topic of seduction returned, her eyes darkened with threads of lust and desire. It wasn’t difficult to stir the flames of passion within the young Zeltron, but they were rapidly growing in strength. She was surprised to find that as she reflected on their first meeting, there was little anger to be found. Sure, she could still feel the rage she’d felt as a Padawan, but it was dulled by a desire to grow and strengthen herself.

Exhaling through her nose, she moved to sit beside him. “You probably already know this, but I’ve…tapped into the power of the dark side before. I didn’t mean to, but I was angry…really, really angry and it just sort of happened. It didn’t feel good, and I…” She trailed, her eyes squinting slightly as she recalled wrapping her hands around the throat of her ex-lover. “I hurt someone I care about.” She folded her hands in her lap, head tilting towards them as she spoke. “But at the same time, I felt a sort of strength I’ve never felt before. As if something was spurring me on.” Her eyes fell closed. “I felt as if I’d regressed as a Jedi.”

Taking in a deep breath, she held it before attempting to breathe out all of her feelings. Opening her eyes, she sighed. No such luck. The desire, curiosity and alluring fear were still present within her.

Turning to face Vengeance once more, she took a few moments to take him in. She did want his arms back around her, his hand to cup her cheek and run through her hair. She wanted him to ravage her and take her until she couldn’t stand it. Joza wanted to give herself to him. But she wouldn’t let her lust move to the surface, and so it survived as a rapid flicker of fire in her eyes and the slight parting of her lips.

“Your eyes…they’ve changed color since we’ve last met?”

It sounded more like a question than a statement, and Joza shook her head in an attempt to get herself back on track. "What do you mean by something more?” Her brows would rise as she spoke slowly, unable to keep the interest from leaking through her voice, though she already had a vague idea. “Aside from Makashi, what…else could you teach me?”

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

He chuckled.

"I have never been a Jedi so I wouldn't know anything about that particular set of chains."

He paused with a sigh.

"The light and the darkness are neither binding nor freeing." "What binds us is a combination of our own limitations and and the shackles placed on us by others." "Everyone faces the same dilemma." "Swallow and attempt to suppress your emotions and eventually they boil over causing you to do something rash and chaotic." "Much like I imagine happened between you and the person you cared about." "However if you never control your emotions and let them flow freely all the time it overrides the progress we have made towards a more civilized society." "You devolve into a shell of a person driven only by instinct and not the combination of instinct and reason."

He took a sip of his drink.

"Acolyte's do not survive training for two reasons and it is almost exclusively the fault of the Master." "Acolyte's are mislead to the point of brainwashed into believing to succeed all other must fail by overseers or tradition itself." "They are pitted against each other day and night until they collapse from exhaustion, are killed by another Acolyte, or are the last one standing." "Then are accepted by a Knight or Lord for further training." "If they are unlucky they are accepted by a Sith who believes the propaganda." "That weakness is a cancer that must be weeded out or killed off."

He cocked his head to the side for a moment.

"Then there are people like me." "Who teach and train Acolyte's...who recognize weakness for what it truly is.................room to grow and improve." "Don't get me wrong I have beaten Acolyte's, I have even stabbed one before, well two." "The goal and result however has never been death." "The first made a near fatal mistake during a duel. Which was promptly stopped so the Acolyte could receive medical attention." "The second...............well had a problem with accepting defeat and causing a serious wound was unavoidable." "Every other one though fared exactly how you did the first time we met." "A little bruised, maybe a little scratched up but no worse for wear."


He closed his eyes for a minute a False side Aura returning his eyes to their natural color.

"Using the dark side too much has adverse effects on the body." "With training it can be temporarily concealed but to be reversed would require a complete transition to the light side for an extended period of time."

He chuckled for a moment clearly amused she missed his point.

"In the context it was intended something more meant mind blowing sex..............maybe even a legitimate relationship." "As far as what else I can teach you............"

He looked at her for a long moment before he answered.

"...............how to live." "How to be not Jedi or Sith but a whole and complete person." "To rise above limitations................" "Sure I could teach you how to fight, how to use more than just Makashi, how to use the force to make you stronger and faster, to even use the force to take a life." "However that is nothing you couldn't learn on your own." "The job of a Master, of a mentor is not to control what and how to learn." "The job is to be there for you.............to lift you up when you are down and to be there at your side celebrating your successes."

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

It occurred to Joza that this was the first time she’d spoken with a Sith in a civil manner while discussing Sith theory. Actually, it was probably the only time she’d taken to a serious discussion like this with a dark sider without violent undertones. Though the situation did have the potential to escalate to that, it didn’t seem like something that either of them wanted. She was more interested in picking his brain this time around.

“I hear similarities and differences between what I’ve been told and what you’re telling me.” Her shoulders rose and fell as if to indicate that it wasn’t a big deal, but now she was wondering about the validity of her sources. After all, the Jedi weren’t what she’d envisioned them as during her childhood. “But on either front, controlling emotion is key, right?” Another thought occurred to her. “How many Acolytes have you trained?”

Her eyes widened for a moment when he enlightened her as to what he was referring to with “something more”, a slow grin plastering her face before she toned it down. “Mind blowing sex is something I’m always for…that is, if you think you can satisfy me.” A brow rose slightly, then fell. “When it comes to relationships…I’m not the monogamous type.” She couldn’t deny that he was drawing her in, with both is presence and his words. If nothing else, she wanted to try and understand things from his point of view if only for a little bit.

She let the silence fall between them for a moment, glancing down at her feet. In that moment, she felt like the child she was when she’d first met him, her past experiences pushed from her mind. “I don’t know what to say.” She spoke honestly, looking up at him and shrugging. As indecisive as she was, her tone was even and smooth. “I understand that operating under the Jedi code is…detrimental in some areas. But it has helped me to control my anger and anxiety.” She ran a hand through her hair exhaling through her nose. “I try not to give these things too much thought, but every day I waver back and forth between the line.” She paused for a moment. “Are you comfortable living how you are now? Do you suffer?”

[member="Vengeance"]

 

[Kenrath]

Vengeance chuckled.

"No little Morsel not control.............channeling emotion." "Preferable in constructive ways............for me it explains why I spend 12 to 14 hours a day in the training rooms."

He looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Well I have trained one Apprentice to Knighthood." "I have another Apprentice who will never make Knight because she seems to be more interested in my skills as a lover than in my skills as a Sith." "Another 6 or 7 have attended single to multiple training sessions I have taught."

He nodded.

"Monogamy is subjective........one upon a time I practiced it." "She was smart, intelligent, and a playful seductress." "One who's hunger matched my own." "Since then well I have had plenty of practice but truth be told I sincerely hope you are entirely too much for me to handle.

He smirked giving her a playful wink letting her bask in the uncomfortable silence that she eventually broke.

"We all waver Joza." "When I was first forced into the ranks of the Sith I killed by the dozens, by the hundreds even." "Not only did I enjoy it but it was like a drug to me.......a drug I couldn't get enough of." "Then I met Melori and everything changed." "She was what grounded me., what brought me back from the brink of madness and I would like to think I did the same for her." "Then it became about family and protecting family at all cost." "Then I lost her............and for awhile a regressed."

He paused.

"I left it all behind..........went to a place I felt safe, felt at home." "I stayed there and centered myself until I was ready to rejoin the Galaxy." "The first thing I did was seek out Corvus Raaf of all people." "I know hard to believe a sith would seek out a Jedi Grand Master for advice and comfort." "Truth is Corvus and I had a conversation very similar to the one you and I are having now." "Sure we did not agree on every point especially the topic of Family before code, before the light of the dark."

He smiled.

"I guess that is a long and complicated way of saying we all suffer but yes I have found a balance that helps make me comfortable in who I am and what I do." "Part of that balance is people like you." "Despite being a Jedi when I met you on Lothal I saw something in you that spoke to me." "You are not the first, and you may not be the last."

He looked at her for a moment.

"I am Sith Joza and I will always be Sith." "That does not mean there are not people, Jedi even, like you that mean something to me." "Who I consider to be my family."

He smiled sticking out his tongue at her.

"Even if you don't want to be."

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

“Family before code…” Joza’s voice was laced with hesitation as she ruminated on his words. “Sounds like you’ve had quite the journey. I never would have guessed, but I suppose that that everyone is fighting some sort of battle or harboring something on the inside.” It was almost unnerving to get a glimpse into the Sith’s mind and to find out that he was actually a person. She’d let go of the belief that all Sith were monsters long ago, but it was hard to think of them as people who had experiences, good and bad. Many of them were shaped from the time they were young, much like Vengeance was. Either way, she hoped that one day she’d be in a place where she was comfortable with herself as well, lest she end up self-destructing.

And then she blinked, looking taken aback. “Family? Me?” She asked, almost incredulously. Her own family was small and broken, amounting to her mother and father, a man who had slipped out after she’d been born. It was only recently that she’d managed to track him down and have her first contact with the man who had sired her. Even if Vengeance was only playing with her, the notion of being a part of his family tugged at her heart strings.

Closing her eyes, Joza sighed and leaned forward, letting her forehead press against his shoulder—the first contact she’d willingly initiate with him. “That actually doesn’t sound too terrible.” She’d roll her eyes to look up at him if he didn’t push her away. “So, what do I get if I’m a part of your family?” She teased, arching her brows with a low chuckle.

[member="Vengeance"]