An Epic of Time Wasted ( Sky )

[Ben Watts]

When she released the force choke, Ben sucked in air as fast as he could, probably not the smartest of decisions but he could not help it. He crumbled to the ground and clutched at his throat as he breathed in as much air as he could. On one knee, he looked up at her, again staring at her with a look of hope gleaming in his eyes. He could still feel her anger towards him, she wanted to break his neck, but she released him which was all that mattered. Taking a few more breaths to full refill his lungs, he pushed himself back to his feet, and he stood tall again.

"I'll do whatever it takes to gain your trust." He said as he reached up and felt his throat where the invisible hand had just been. It was not his first time being choked with the force, but it was the first time he had intentionally allowed it, and the weakness he had showed was strange to him. It was strange due to the fact that she could have killed him if she wanted to, the thought kept racing through his mind, his entire life's work could have been ended in an instant. "Though, if I may, I would ask that you not choke me again." He smiled, trying to lesson the tension, but he was not sure how well it would work. He knew it was hard to connect with someone like Ben when one was struggling with the dark side. He was often told he was too happy all the time, but he could not help it, it was just who he was.

 

[Sky Kerberos]

"Ok, I promise. Though there's always lightning."

Was it a joke or a threat? She'd go with the former for now, as her lips turned up slightly in a smile.

She cocked her head to one side, trying to make sense of his pain. Could she feel empathy having caused it? His only crime was in trying to help her. But at least now she could somehow believe that she could trust him, despite her unorthodox methods.

"Will you report me to the grandmaster?"

 

[Ben Watts]

Ben chuckled when she threatened him with lightning. That was something he had never experienced, and he hoped he never did, but if he wasn't careful around her he just might. Scratching his head, he thought about her question, whether or not he would report her to Darron. Darron would not like it if he found out that two of his Council members had a scuffle like this, especially if Ben had put himself in danger for no other reason besides trying to prove a point, he was worth more to the Order than that and he could not be letting things like that happen.

"No, I won't report you to him, all of this would be for nothing if I did." There was something about her that intrigued him. He was not sure what it was, maybe it was the fact that she was a Jedi Master with so much darkside in her, or maybe he just liked fixing problems that he had no business trying to fix. "I don't care about your past, what your other self may have done, or why you feel the urge to do the things that you do. I am here for you as a friend, someone to talk to in a place where there doesn't seem to be anyone willing to listen, and you don't have to tell me everything. I just want you to know that I do care, enough to tell you something I have never told anyone, and enough to submit to you as you choked me. Maybe it isn't enough, I don't know, but I hope that it is."

 

[Sky Kerberos]

Friends.

How little time it takes some humans to attach to each other. We are in a huge galaxy, so big it is inconceivable to most. Yet, we gravitate towards each other no matter the distance...for what purpose? That was what she could never figure out. All other organisms seem to pass each other by without care or concern. The only time they stop is to mate, then again they separate. Why were humans so different? Why did they have the needs for friendships...true ones and not simply the ones of alliance and pack order. Or was that it? Did his naming her as a friend come down to protection at a later date.

"Friends, even though we barely know each other? Proposing trust, when we first meet? Ben...you are strange."

She said this not in anger, allowing it to seep back within her soul...the darkness falling away for now. Taking a step closer, she searched his eyes with hers. How could they be so different, him a Jedi to its fullest. Willing to spread open all emotions at a whim, lay his life on the line for a stranger. And her, who would retreat from any bonds, knowing that trust was not something that was even real. Altruism was nonexistent. Friendships were doomed to fail, as quickly as star dust is eternal. But despite knowing this...she yearned for it.

"Say I allow all my hesitations to fall as if sand in the wind. If I accept your terms...and believe that you do care. The fallacy in that is you seem too willing to care for everything and everyone."

Was she rambling and making no sense? She bit down on her lip, trying to put her feelings into words. His presence confused things, she could not think straight while he was so near. One second she was force choking him, the next unable to find solid ground to her convictions. "What I'm saying...is you offer me friendship and trust so quickly. Why? Is this just what you do to everyone?"

 

[Ben Watts]

He expected the response from her, it was not easy being untrustworthy and then being faced with someone who offered ultimate trust without knowing a person. He was not sure why, or how, but he had a keen sense for who to trust and who not to trust. It was mostly a gut feeling, but he had not been wrong yet, he guessed it was just the force telling him what was right and what wasn't. As he had grown older, become more in tune with the force, it was almost as if he was more in sync with the force than he was in sync with himself. He trusted the force more than he trusted any person because it had never steered him wrong, only pushed him in the right direction, and he had given up trying to fight it long ago.

"I can't explain it," He started, pausing over his words, trying to grab the sentences that made most sense to him. He did not even fully understand it himself, every human sign told him not to trust her, but there was one thing in the back of his mind telling him to do it. A feeling he was unfamiliar with, a voice he did not hear very often, but it was as annoying as it was loud. "I just have a feeling about you. A good feeling, and that is why I offer you my trust."

She asked if he was like this with everyone, and in a way, he was. But not like this, he would have never allowed anyone to try and choke him out, most people when willing to go that far would actually crush his throat and leave him for dead without a moments notice. But she did not. She released him and now she seemed to be coming around a bit. Albeit slowly. "No... no I do not do this for everyone. I wish I could tell you why I am, I really do, but I honestly don't know. Darron trusts you, he told me he did, so I want to trust you to. I want to be someone you can count on, someone to change all the wrongs that you may have experience. Maybe it is stupid, maybe, but it is what it is and I am not going to change my mind. I will be someone you can talk to, I will stand by your side, and I will not fail you."

 

[Sky Kerberos]

Ben was right, most of what he said was nonsensical and stupid. How could he even begin to right wrongs, how was that even possible? And the only wrong she knew of was her creation in and of itself. It was against nature. Perverse by definition...could she even have a soul being brought to life in such a way? If he would right that wrong, it would mean to cast her back to hell.

Yet none of the mattered. It was just word play, and she was coming to find that what he said was not necessarily what he felt. She believed his intentions were pure, despite the awkward words that let his mouth. Everything he said was to try to prove to her that he 'trusted' and 'cared' for her. Yet his last words, that he would stand by her side and not fail her...

What is it you want from me in return?

She thought, for wasn't every bond give and take? So far she simply tested him, and he only provided words for her comfort. The give and take uneven. But as she thought before, altruism was nonexistent. He offered her all this, but what was the price.

But she did not say it. She knew his answer, for most of his words were scripted as to what a Jedi would say. However, no Jedi would have tolerated her darkness, and still swore themselves to be by their side. Maybe he would break those views of what a Jedi would be...and simply be who he was.

"I have never had anyone..." she said softly, her eyes breaking their hold on him. She looked to the horizon, knowing deep within her forgotten memories that the greatest of Brotherhood bonds were broken here. That she had trusted once...and that trust had ended on these grounds. But not by another's hand. She was the betrayer. She had broken something that will never be fixed...she did not know what. She did not understand how she even knew that much, but the feeling was inescapable. The pain came to her, as if it had never left.

"Ben, perhaps you should not trust me. I say this...only because I do not want to see you hurt. The lightside within me wishes only to push you away, to protect you from an unwanted fate. Yet another part of me..." Self serving, selfish part. "...wants you to be by my side."

She stopped looking off to the echoes of past hardships, and looked curiously at him, wondering his response. Would he do as the Light demands of her, to leave and live without the erosion of her soul that seeks to destroy, or would he forgo those demands? He was beautiful...the light within him clear...she did not wish to hurt him, but could not help but wish him to stay.

 

[Ben Watts]

"I have never had anyone..."

She was finally beginning to open up to him and a moment of joy washed through his body. If he could just get her to trust him, to know that he had no ulterior motive, then maybe he could find out what was causing all of this darkness and pain. He wanted to take that pain away, let her know that she could be happy, be one with the force as he was. It would not be easy, once the dark side had crept in, it was very hard to get out. It was like a win stain on a white carpet, nearly impossible to clean, but even the tiniest drop is noticeable.

"Ben, perhaps you should not trust me. I say this...only because I do not want to see you hurt. The lightside within me wishes only to push you away, to protect you from an unwanted fate. Yet another part of me..."

Well, he had been making progress, but now she was wondering if him trusting her was a good thing. It was a trait that many people had, no belief in themselves, a self fulfilling prophecy of heart break and despair. If one believe it enough, that they would let everyone in their lives down, then that was exactly what would happen. Ben always believed in himself, or at least tried to, negative thoughts lead to the dark side, and he had been over it enough times that he knew exactly what that meant. Stepping closer, he slowly let his arm rise, making sure to go at a steady pace so that she was not frightened. Gently, he placed his arm on her shoulder, and he smiled at her. A confident and promising smile.

"I am willing to take the risk of you hurting me. I told you about leaps of faith, this is me leaping, and if I fall I fall. I would rather try and fail than never try at all." He squeezed her shoulder gently before removing it, not wanting to linger to long in case she did not like it, dropping his arm to his side he kept the warm smile on his face. "I will stand by your side, I am already too far in, you can't get rid of me now."

 

[Sky Kerberos]

If I fall, I fall.

You will fall. She silently cursed herself for thinking that, wishing she could end these thoughts. This was not who she was. The only reasoning behind her unrest had to be she failed as a clone, her body rejecting the process...for Darron would not lie to her about who she was, her past, would he? No. She had to trust in his words. Ben and Darron were close friends, and if Ben trusted Darron, she would too.

For he would not lie to her.

The weight of his hand on her shoulder offered the reality of this. She would trust him, and not simply because she had to trust somebody. If it was up to her, it would be no one...but as he was, she was too far in to reject his friendship now.

*********​

After the Clockwork War​

A shadow approached, wings to both side. The black feathers belonged both to the shadow and to the real world; their patterns being detailed and yet vague at once. The movement, the silhouette was a mirror image of herself, yet no light was present in this dark angel of death. The figure leaned over her bed but she could not move. Paralysis held her down, she could only take in the image, helpless in any other way. The shadow reached down, the darkness coming off the walls to touch her hand. The angel retreated suddenly, though the searing touch remained as it traveled along her arms and unto her back. The tattoo along the back of her neck and down her spine began to burn in each whimsical twist, as the deafening voice saying traitor overcame.

She woke.

Quickly, she got up, glad it was just a dream. Still, she walked to the mirror, trying to see her tattoo. She had been cloned with it somehow, which is impossible since tattoos are not part of the genetic makeup. But yet, here it was. It was supposedly part of her blood, something she would never part with, though the meaning was unknown to her. As she looked down her body it seemed to…

She closed her eyes again, telling herself to wake up. But in the darkness of her shut eyes she saw the dark angel. The black wings out, as if to rip out her soul and carry her away.

Opening them, she was met with the night and nothing else. She got dressed in a rush and she left her room, walking until she found herself at the other end of the compound. Not just in areas unknown though, for she was pacing in front of Ben's door.

Ever since she had met him, she managed to keep her distance despite wanting more. When around him she felt as if she could be who she was--but she often went against her desires to be near him…for though he could offer her peace, she knew she could only bring him pain. Plus she had heard he was a Jedi in the truest sense of the word. Even if she felt…more…toward him, he could never return that. The light was his love, and she would solely bring darkness.

Her hand brushed the frame of the door, she wished to knock…for him to save her from these nightmares. It sounded foolish now though, to run from dreams that were clearly just that. But she could not go back to her room--she could not bring herself to do that.

 

[Ben Watts]

Sleep never came easy for Ben, his thoughts were so scattered and spread all over the place, so many problems and worries were placed on his shoulders. Since the Omni threat, his sleep came a bit worse, he remembered all of the lives that had been lost that day. He worried about what could have been, what would happen if something like Omni happened again, would they be ready? He knew he was not supposed to think about these things, but he could not help it, the thoughts always seemed to creep in. Especially in his sleep when he had no control over what happened, the one place he could not control, when everything that he kept under wraps for so long was finally able to be let loose.

His eyes snapped open as he felt a presence. For a moment, he was confused, disoriented and unsure of where he was. He blinked his eyes, trying to adjust to the darkness, his dreams overlapped into the real world for a moment. Sitting up, he rubbed his eyes, looking around the room to see if anyone was in his room. There never was, no one came to his room, he felt safe in the comfort of his room. Continuing to look around, he remembered why he woke up, he felt the presence of something.... someone. Regaining his composure, he reached out with the force, someone was at his door. After he was fully awake, he realized who it was, Sky was standing outside of his door.

Looking over to his clock, he noticed it was well into the early hours of the morning, what was she doing there so late? Ripping the covers off of him, he slung his legs over the side of the bed, grabbing a pair of shorts that he had pulled off before sleeping. Pulling them on, he stood up, not taking the time to pull on a shirt. The light from the moon of Tython shone brightly through his room, casting a shadow off of his presence, it gave him enough light to walk across his rather large room with plenty of light. She was not moving, she was standing outside of his door, apparently she did not wish to wake him. He knew of her darkside problems, they spoke rarely, but he knew she had problems to deal with. This would be the first time they had met, alone, since the first time they had been introduced to each other.

Turning the knob, he opened the door, trying his best to look awake and alert. "Sky," He started, whispering so as not to wake anyone else in his wing, only just now realizing that he was shirtless. He felt indecent, he should not present himself to her like this, but it was in the wee hours of the morning. "Are you OK?" Something had to be wrong for her to come to his room. Though he was rarely in his own room, it was his sanctuary. "Come inside, no need to stand in the hallway." He stood aside, offering her a way to walk in.

 

[Sky Kerberos]

Walk away. Pretend you're just walking down the halls, wandering, yes at a completely unreasonable time, but you had no intention of knocking.

But then where would she go? Back to her room, alone.

To be here was her only choice.

Though seeing Ben, without the robes that he normally had, did make her a tad uneasy. Red touched her checks, as she walked past him into his room. She remembered certain things of her past life. She had been married to Je'gan Olra'en when she was 27, but she recalled that name with no emotional attachment to it. Whatever happened between herself and him had been lost in the memory transfer, though she sensed it was not positive. Now, only 22 years old, and she had forgotten in both a physical and emotional sense what it was like to be with someone...to touch another, to love someone.

"Everything is alright...just nightmares," she admitted, embarrassed that the intangible had led her here. But was what she saw along her back intangible? The tattoo that still burned within her flesh, as if it had a life of itself, moving and twisting yet staying still. Her hand went absently to behind her neck, as if to cool the heat which it still generated. "I did not mean to awake you."

 

[Ben Watts]

He shut the door behind him and walked over to his closet to find himself a shirt. Slinging it on, he also turned on a lamp in his room, it lit the room enough to where they would both be able to see. He felt a bit weird in his room, it was larger than most of the other inhabitants of the Temple, but Darron had insisted. It was mostly empty, the shelves were filled with Jedi history and teachings from years ago, his bed was rather large as it was one of the few luxuries he would allow himself. Besides that there was a small desk, a few chairs, and a comfortable area for him to meditate. Grabbing two chair, he pulled them over, sitting down in the chair across from Sky.

"Nightmares, huh?" Ben said with a nod of his head, turning away and looking out the window, remembering his own nightmares. "I know all about those...." It was true, he wished he did not dream of such things, but he could not control it. If he could he would finally get a good nights sleep, but for years he was used to sleepless nights, so he had grown accustomed to it by now. "Do not worry about waking me, I have many sleepless nights as it is. I know how it can be to be alone in your chambers after nightmares, and I told you, my door is always open." He wondered what Darron would think if word had gotten back to him that someone had spotted Sky coming into his chambers at such a late hour. He was already questioning Ben, saying that something was going on between him and Sky, but despite Ben trying to explain he persisted.

She seemed uneasy about something, but he was not sure what, he noticed that she seemed a bit uneasy and her hand was rubbing her neck. "So what is it that you dream of that keeps you awake?"

 

[Sky Kerberos]

"A dark angel that has come for me, though it was not to return me to Hell, rather to...I am not sure," she said, feeling immature in coming to him over such nightmares. He had said she was welcome to come to him anytime…but all she felt from him was walls…was him closed off from her.

Perhaps this was how the Jedi were. She had felt in onboard the ship to Coruscant when she sensed the signature of her bloodline. Having reached out to the other Jedi onboard for strength, she was met with solely a barricade. These Jedi spend so much effort in living to the code. No emotion. No passion…she was not like them.

She could not help but follow the passionate fire which called from within her. And though it allowed the nightmares to flourish, she could not help herself. She assumed that this would not hinder her path as a Jedi…but being met with such strict emotionless hurdles, she could not help but think otherwise.

It was true. Jedi had relationships, even the Grandmaster. But was it one dimensional? Boarded by rules, by laws.

"What of your nightmares?" she said, wishing to no longer think of herself for if darkness came for her, then she would stand alone to defy it. For right now, despite being in an order full of people…it was how she felt. Alone. Through the shadows that the moonlit cast, she looked at Ben, wondering if he was truly the same as all the others. Was he different? Could he look upon her and not see an outsider who had to be fixed…but see her for who she truly was.

She looked at him, knowing that for some reason he intrigued her. Attracted to the light that cascaded from him, and despite her darkness she had no desire to change him. What was one without the other, for if one side was extinguished all the galaxy would end. And that was her pull toward him…as magnets attracting each other from across seas so vast, yet she was lost in the storms…and knew right now he was but a closed port.

Her tattoo burned deeper still, as if verifying her sentiments.

 

[Ben Watts]

Ben listened as she spoke of an angel and his thoughts drifted off, wondering what they could mean. He knew she fought the darkness in her daily, and she was trying her hardest to ward it off, but it was no easy task for anyone. He wished he could just rid her of all her dark manifestations right then and there, but it was a fools dream, one he could not accomplish even if he tried. Only through perseverance and willpower would she be able to defeat it, and he would not be able to do it for her, she would have to be the one to stand up and erase it from her memories, erase it from herself.

Bringing his thoughts back around his eyes caught a glimpse of Sky's, and he could see the pain and confusion in them, he wondered what was going on in her mind. She looked at him with a longing. A longing that he could not put his finger on, maybe she wished for him to just whisk away her pain, but he could not. As much as he wished he could, it would never be that simple. She invoked strange emotions in him and he did not understand why. Why did he exert so much effort to help her, it was not like him, he was usually one of the most distant and hard to breach people within the Jedi Order. His mind and heart were pure and distractions were not something he put on his shoulders so easily. He did not consider her a distraction, though, she was a friend in need and being a friend was what Jedi were supposed to do. They helped people, not push them away, a sentiment that he wished his father had shared.

"Ah, you know, the usual," She mentioned his nightmares and his thoughts were brought back to them. Every night they were the same, except those perfect nights when he did not dream at all. "Will I fail everyone? Can I protect them all? Questions, questions, and more questions that I do not, nor will I ever, know the answer to. The worst is a dream of a boy, he is running, and I am chasing him. But behind me is a man who is chasing me, at least I think he is. I am slow, the force does not help me speed up, and the boy is just out of reach. When the man behind me finally catches up, I turn to fight, but he is not after me. It's then that I realize I am not trying to capture the boy, I am trying to get to him first, so that the man cannot take him. The man overtakes me, catches the boy, and I watch as he is about to kill the boy." It was obviously a terrible thing for Ben to talk about it because, he did not notice it, but the pain and sorrow was real in his voice. Even about a dream, something that has no meaning, the fact that he cannot save the boy hurts him.

"I just...." He paused, he realized he was talking openly, something he did not do. Why should he put his burdens onto someone else when he could deal with them on his own. He was supposed to be strong, a leader, not someone who doubted himself. "I just want to protect everyone even though I know I can't. As hard as a try, as hard as Darron tries, we cannot save them all and that is what bugs me. It's why I lose sleep. It sounds ridiculous, I know, but I just want to be able to protect everyone. I want to see a world that lives in peace where everyone can live without the fear of someone hurting them, stealing from them, or killing them. To know that somewhere, right now, someone is not under my protection irks me." He let out a sigh, feeling good that he was saying it all out loud, but feeling left open and strange.

 

[Sky Kerberos]

The dream could hold deeper meaning, but she was not versed in psychology to read it. Could it be that he was the boy, running from a path that had tortured him. His adult form could never catch the past, never save what had happened, and so the evil comes--and he can only watch helplessly what once was, as it replayed so viciously in his dreams.

Those nightmares had once been hers, and perhaps she just projected that meaning over them. Maybe to him, it was as he said. He wanted to protect all, but no man could do that.

No man. But a god could. It was how all too often Jedi fell. Wishing to do good, but feeling helpless to do so. They have the need for more power to help the innocent, but soon that power becomes the need. She could not picture Ben turning to the dark, seeing all the good within him, but concern fell over her. He was closed off as she had been before… The memory was a blank. A blackhole within her thoughts, and she damned herself for not being able to remember, not being able to finish the thought.

She reached out tentatively, and let her hand touch his arm in a type of solace. It was strange, it was the first time she felt another's skin below her own. The memories implanted in her did not include much of the sensory, only the facts. She had assumed another's flesh would feel like an inanimate object does, but his skin did not. She could not hold her touch for too long, just for a moment, before withdrawing.

"There is a balance in the galaxy, and death of an innocent is part of it even though difficult to make sense of. I cannot even. The Force within you gives you the strength to protect some, but not all, for you are only a man. If somehow you were able to draw that all-powerful strength in order to do the impossible, you would no longer be a man, but the Force and Life itself with the whims to do anything to anyone. You would choose to protect. But without death in the galaxy, there is no room for new life. Without pain and lost…and sorrow, then the feelings of happiness and joy would be taken for granted and soon lose all meaning and depth," At least that was what she told herself. All the past pain and sorrow in her life, she had to make meaning of it someway or she would feel like dying herself. The only way to draw meaning, is to accept what had happen. "That is why we are confined to doing what we feel is too little. But remember what you said…every action no matter how small has a ripple effect. You may feel like you cannot protect everyone, but you do more than you know in every action."

Hopefully that was not rambling, and that he understood what she said. She did not want to him to be upset, wanted to clear that from him somehow.

 

[Ben Watts]

She reached out and touched his arm, and he looked down, seeing her hand on him. He realized that he did not have much physical contact with other people, at all, and he kind of liked it. The only time he was ever touching anyone else was through fighting or a handshake. Nothing when he was in his free time, so even though it was not for long, he enjoyed it while it lasted. She withdrew her hand, quickly, and he wondered why. He guessed it was because it was out of the ordinary, for both of them, and maybe she did not want to overstep her bounds. For a moment, he wished she hadn't, but in the end it was for the best.

When she began talking about small actions having big consequences, he smiled, she was starting to come around a bit. Or at least she knew what his feelings were and she was trying to comfort him. This conversation was vastly different from their first, he did not feel tentative with his words, he felt like they could both talk openly without the threat of the other becoming offended or aggressive. Though they both had differing views, they wanted the same thing, peace. He realized just why he was so drawn to her, she was his opposite, and their shared goal of finding peace within themselves brought them together.

"You're right," He said silently, knowing it was true, but knowing that he would still feel pain over loss. He knew it was all for naught, worrying about every death, but he could not stop himself. "It doesn't make it any easier on me, maybe I make it harder on myself, but you are right. What is the old saying, you wouldn't feel joy if it wasn't for pain?" He had thought that the saying was true, without sadness or pain, how could one possibly know what happiness was. "Sky... I am sorry. I do not mean to put my burdens on you, you did not come here to hear me complain, but thank you for your words."

"The dark angel you told me about, is it trying to hurt you or take you somewhere, in your dreams?"

 

[Sky Kerberos]

"You are not putting burdens on me or complaining," she said, wishing he would not see his burdens as a hindrance to her. He had been there for her, and she could not see him being hurt or filled with sorrow. If she could relieve him at all, it would bring her only happiness to do so. Why did she feel like this towards him? "I only enjoy our time together, and do not feel like you have to barricade yourself of your emotions when around me."

"As for my dream, I am not sure what it wanted. It was not to hurt, nor take me away. It simply touched me and I felt..." she paused, wondering if Ben would think less of her if she showed him her tattoo. The marks of the past, which she knew nothing about, but they still held some control over her, as they heated her body. She could feel her temperature rising, though she could not help but wonder if that was from another cause as she looked at Ben.

She couldn't find the words to describe what she felt, other than trying to explain that it transferred something to her, it brought her tattoo to life in a way, and opened her to a pain which she could not identify. "I felt my tattoo burning. I still do."

The tattoo was of an ancient symbol, one she did not recognize. It was at the back of her neck and gracefully curved down along her spine. Her instinct was to show him, but was worried the feeling was all in her head and he would not understand her pain. But she knew he would wish for her to trust him, and so twisted her hair, pulling it up, and turned to show him her neck.

 

[Ben Watts]

He felt a bit relieved when she mentioned that she hoped he was more open around her. Being open was not his strong suit, he liked to keep things close to the chest, but everyone wanted to vent sometimes. As it stood, she knew more about his personal life than anyone alive or dead, not even Tef or Darron knew as much about him as she did. He was not sure if it was a good thing, or not, but he was leaning towards good. Personally, it was nice to have a sleepless night and not be alone in the darkness of his own room.

She spoke of her dreams and then hesitated, not wanting to continue, but he had a feeling she would. She was much more open now, and hopefully, she knew she could trust Ben. Then she spoke of her tattoo, which he did not know she had, so he was kind of intrigued by it. She pulled her hair back and he leaned forward, reaching his hand up to touch the tattoo. Some people did not like tattoos, but Ben was always fascinated by them, and never bothered. "It burns?" He said, running his hand along it, seeing if any heat was coming from it. He felt nothing, but he noticed that the tattoo kept going down. Gently, he pulled back the collar of her robe, and it was confirmed that it continued down her neck and onto her back. Realizing what he was doing, he let go of her robe, and removed his hand.

"How far down does it go?" The tattoo looked very familiar to him, he felt as if he had seen it before, but he could not quite place it. "Does it only burn after your dreams, or all the time?"

 

[Sky Kerberos]

His hand on her neck made the tattoo's heat feel no longer unwanted. It mingled with his own warmth, causing her to feel so much more than the base emotions of pain. She wished to feel more from him, to negate everything but his warmth, yet he pulled away.

"This is my first nightmare with her in it, the first where it had an effect on my tattoo" she had had many other nightmares before, but ones she knew to be just that: nightmares. Mostly of the cold. Of the dark. Of what all clones must go through. But this one was different, for it seemed real. "Though I call it a tattoo…it is not exactly. A clone should have no tattoos when they are made. But I was created with it, it must be apart of my blood. I do not know the meaning of its design, my memories tell me nothing."

"It does not hurt all the time either," she whispered, as she took Ben's hand gently in her own. She moved it down along her back, feeling his warmth through her clothes as she traced his hand along the tattoo. She stopped right at the curve of her spine to show him where it ended. "It does not hurt underneath your touch."

 

[Ben Watts]

Ben knew a bit of her past life, Darron had told him little, but he did not want to hear it. He cared not of what the person she had been cloned of had done, which side she was on, or what kind of darkness dwelled in her. Sky was different, she was just a clone of that person, and though she shared some of her memories and cravings, she was not her. Though many people would look down on her for what she had done, he was not one of them, so he guessed the tattoo had been something of importance in her her clones life.

She grabbed his hand, placed it on her back, and she ran it down her spine. He did not resist, but he felt a strange feeling both in his stomach, and all throughout his body as she traced her own spine. Never before had he touched another like this, it was new to him, so at first it was strange. Maybe she meant it innocently, but the way she whispered the words to him, he could tell it was different. His Jedi instincts told him to pull away, he had to stop it, but he could not and he did not know why. He liked the feeling it gave him, he liked touching her, and pulling away seemed almost impossible. Stopping at the base of her spine, she held it there, and Ben did nothing to move it.

Standing in front of her, he glanced up, looking her in the eyes and not speaking for a moment. She said the tattoo did not burn under his touch, he did not know why, but she seemed almost relieved to have him touching her. His thoughts swirled, he did not understand what was happening, but he could make a pretty good guess. He realized that he liked staring into her eyes, his brain had been denying it for so long, but there was no denying it now. "Sky... I....." He did not know what he was going to say. He knew what he needed to say, but he could not bring himself to it, he enjoyed the company and he wondered why he had gone so long without it. Instinctively, he ran his hand back up her back where she had traced the line of the tattoo. "I will help you find out what it means if you want." He did not know what else to say, he was not used to this, he wanted to back away and try and go back to sleep. But, much more than that, he wanted to be with her for the rest of the night. He did not think about the nightmares, the wars, the council, only her. And for once, it was refreshing.

 

[Sky Kerberos]

"Yes, I do want to know." His touch could only remain by her side for so long, and she would have to deal with what it means. Also…to eventually find out who she was. Despite her inner protests that say she could trust in what Darron said, that she was a Jedi Master, she had too many questions to end with just that. Was her darkness a thing that belongs to only her, or did she share it with her past.

As Ben ran his hand up her back, it sent a shiver pulsing within her body, a cool breeze to quiet the pain. Every part of her body cried for more, and confused her so. She had never felt this way, had never been touched by another, and could not process why he could bring her such solace and yet such desire and uncertainty in one movement.

Eyes fell from his gaze, wishing to hide her attraction for she was scared he would not return it. For it was not simply an attraction of the body, but towards all of him. His soul, his light which she found was the sole thing to console her chaotic intentions. Without him…she surely would have broken her vows of the Jedi. And if she should look at him, and see rejection, surely the dark angel of her nightmares would break her chains and find the freedom to reign over her soul. So she chose not to look.

Seeing him without his robes, and only a shirt for the first time made her notice his tattoos. Across his arms, and unlike hers they were colorful. Reaching out instinctually, she touched them, wondering if they were a part of his blood as hers was. Her touch on his skin barely made contact in such a light caress as she traced the beautiful designs. She did it innocently, though even in innocence one could find such passion behind it. "What of your tattoos, what do they mean to you?"