Private Compassion & Compromise (Kyra Perl)

[Caedyn Arenais]

Kyra Perl hadn't seen his follow-up attack and upon failing to fend it off, she seemed to turn to desperate measures in the hope of driving him back. Slash after slash, her attacks were wild and fast, Caedyn stepping back to evade each one, leaning sideways and otherwise moving just moments before her lightsaber could sweep passed him. He didn't try to parry her blade, nor stop it in a straight up block.

While his movements would seem quick and unnaturally precise from Kyra's eyes, in Caedyn's perception of the bout, time slowed in lieu of the Force and his precognitive sensory abilities. Were his Padawan able to pace herself and spend more time in meditation, she would be able to achieve such things over time, however it seemed the best way to encourage her was to show her how it was done.

His steps were one at a time however, and while he leaned in and out, stepped when was absolutely necessary, Caedyn used only as much energy and stamina as was required of him; Soresu as he had told her, relied on the opponent to ware themselves out and strike when they were tired and vulnerable.

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra couldn't fathom that he would use another sword form in her lesson. He had warned her last lesson, he had even given her a few words of instruction on it. But the fact remained-- Kyra was not a student that used thought inside a lesson. He asked her to let her instincts guide her, and she ended up somewhere in the middle:

Thrashing without muscle memory to guide her in this new form, yet blind enough to see his lack of strikes as a sign she was beating back his defenses. Her movements picked up in vigor, her chest heaving with breath as she tried to match his increasing speed. A lesson on force speed had been given before, but only for running. For sword fighting?

She didn't even consider the finesse it would require, a bout of frustration driving ta swell of energy through her body. She swiped hard and fast, movements blurring, banking on a connection with his body.

Without it, her momentum would overtake her. She'd up up face down, swordless, the weapon digging into the wooden wall across the way.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

As Kyra Perl picked up the pace, her accuracy suffered but this also forced Caedyn into needing to exert some effort into his maintaining consistent evasive distance.

She sweeps with the blade were all forceful and eventually her momentum started to impact her more-so that it did cause trouble for Caedyn. He didn't seek to advise her of it just yet, she was someone that needed to learn through trial and error, often times at her own unfortunate expense.

Finally, it all became too much. Her lightsaber flung off to one side of the room where as Kyra went the other way, falling to the floor and leaving Caedyn to stumble back a step or two, finally releasing a huff of breath, sighing heavily as he was finally given reprieve.

With her Lightsaber out of reach, Caedyn disengaged his own and lowered himself to crouch upon the front of his feet, resting his arms against his knees whilst looking to his apprentice.

"Can you tell me what went wrong there?".

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra peeled herself off the mat, cradling her wrist while shaking off the pain. She gave a groan of complaint, sitting up before him with a pout on her face. "I'm too light, I sent myself flying." It wasn't a question, her assumption self-assured.

She flexed her wrist to find it unharmed and just sore. Thank the force, she had no desire to go back to the infirmary. "I don't think it's fair you did all that. It's saber practice, not force practice. I can't help I'm not fully grown yet." Maybe if she put rocks in her clothing, she mulled.

Yes, that was her solution to using too much force. Rocks in her pockets. Because learning control-- that definitely wasn't it.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"Weight has nothing to do with it, nor is growth" Caedyn shook his head with a slight laugh escaping him. "You let your emotions control you, lost your sense of self-awareness and went about swinging blindly. At that point it was only a matter of time before you slipped up and left yourself vulnerable. You recall what I told you about Soresu don't you?" he had advised her not to overthink everything, and yet at the same time hadn't meant for her to stop thinking completely.

"I know I said to let your instincts guide you, but you also need to mind yourself" He explained, "Whether it's frustration or excitement, fear and anxiety, these things can get in the way of our judgement and sense of reason. It leads us to make mistakes like you just did now. This is why we train in sparring lessons, so we can learn from what we can do well but most especially from our mistakes" he encouraged Kyra Perl , or at-least hoped she would focus on the fact that he was encouraging her, as opposed to hearing the word 'mistake' and dwelling on it too much.

 

[Kyra Perl]

"Uuuuuuuuugh," she complained. "Why does everything always comes back to emotions? I'm an empath-- that's not how it works! Think, don't think-- feel, yet feel nothing at all! You guys are so contradictory, it hurts my heaaaaaaaad." She rubbed at her old concussion bump unconsciously. While she was more than fine, the reminder of past failures made this recent one stick out.

"You don't make any sense to me." Despite the whine to her tone, it was an honest admittance. He had glimpsed how different her perspective was in the past. Where others might seen a lack of effort, she was trying to express a lack of understanding.

There were many things he'd have to bridge for her be capable of emulating as a student.

She raised her hand, calling her saber out of the wall and back to her with the force. "You just want me to fail, then you can blame me to the elders."

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

Caedyn shook his head in disagreement with her accusation, "You know I wouldn't do that...-I'm trying to encourage you but I've got things to learn as well between us both" he gave a wary shrug of his shoulders, his brows furrowing a little out of concern for Kyra Perl ; It seemed their difficulty to meet in the middle still left her in doubt of his intentions.

"What I'm trying to say is that sparring is like a tactical game, as much as it is a beat-em-up game" Caedyn sought a different way of explaining himself, "Sometimes you have to wait out your opponent, let them make all the moves so they slip up and then take your opportunity. Other times you need to go on the attack, but you gotta be smart about it too" it was difficult for him to try and word things in a way that might make sense to her, and even still he wasn't sure she would catch his meaning.

"Your opponents going to try to read your body language and use anything they can against you, even your possible mistakes or openings. Your every move is under their scrutiny, and so you must treat them the same way. Watch them closely and let the Force aid you in sensing their intentions, the way their emotions feel and what this might mean for their next moves".

 

[Kyra Perl]

Her building frustration crinkled into her features, a stiff frown forming the more he talked. "That makes no sense!" She huffed! "Feel but don't feel! Sense but don't think! How is that even possible? You can't be and - and - and not be all at once!"

Said the girl that had no mastery of meditation, nor control over her thoughts. What he said felt impossible because for her it was. Instinct was feeling, she could not obverse without taking on the world around her, therefor it must be impossible. He was speaking hog wash. And he was frustrating her to boot, just like all the rest!

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"Okay...Okay..." Caedyn resigned, his hands up before him in a sort of 'I surrender' gesture.

"Let's try something else then...-I'm new at this whole empath thing, I'm sorry. I don't mean to be frustrating or impossible" he apologized before moving to make another suggestion in the hope that it might make more sense to her. "You can read other peoples emotions right. Once having read someone or felt as they feel...-Can you imitate that? Repeat that sense of feeling, even if they aren't around?" he asked curiously.

Caedyn wondered if she could imitate his own feelings and mindset in a spar, were she able to get a thorough reading of him during their sparring matches. In a strange way, it made a sort of sense to him but it was all guess work. Trial and error, and every error cost a bit of Kyra Perl 's confidence in their training together.

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra huffed and puffed on the floor, needing more than a spare moment to cool down from her frustrations, even when he withdrew from the moment. Her brows furrowed deeper at his question, a sense of mistrust forming. "....Yes..." she answered unwillingly, looking for his angle. "But I don't see how that helps. You want me not to feel-- not bring up old feelings." At the concept of that, countless sensations came back to mind-- anger, frustration, satisfaction, calm, pleasure-- all hit her in a rushing pull, her heat filling with heat, the recollection tactile.

She cleared her throat and pouted harder, if just to make him feel bad! Yeah! Stupid lesson, apologize again! She crossed her arms.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"So..." Caedyn continued, albiet pensively as Kyra Perl didn't seem too cooperative after that last defeat; "Technically, if you were to learn how I think and feel during our sparring matches, you could then refer to those feelings and train of thought out in the field in a real engagement?" he asked her, airing his idea with further intrigue.

"Sort of like a photographic memory...-Being able to reflect back on what you felt or saw, and using it in future situations?" he further elaborated in the hope that she would be following. Kyra was struggling in herself with how she felt, but she wasn't alone, this was as much a challenge for the Jedi Knight as it was for his Padawan.

 

[Kyra Perl]

Her frowned deepened for a spare moment. That was stu- She blinked, her eyes widening slightly. Oh. Oh. Her mind rain through all the ways this could work for her, all the possibilities it opened up. She had always thought she was incapable of doing so many jedi things because she was an empath. The concept that it could be the thing that help her rattled her.

And excited her all at once.

A smile cracked across her features, the padawan clearly following. "So you're saying that if I can't be a jedi I can pretend to be one instead!" She chirped, her arms dropping. The excitement faded for a moment, a thought dawning on her. "But wait- what if I can't do it?"

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"I'm not saying that you pretend" Caedyn frowned, not particularly liking the idea of faking her position as a Jedi, "But you would be using the help of your friends and fellow Jedi, which is something all students and Jedi Knights do in their training with one another" he said, sort of justifying the prospective route to training her as a means of reflecting and capitalizing on her ability to work with others.

"In a way, I'll be teaching you to do these things but instead of seeing my examples during training, you'll be feeling them through a direct connection with me, as if seeing things from my perspective and using this to help you practice the same..." he described, trying to make better sense of it himself. It sounded good in theory but they'd still yet to put it to the test.

"Don't be so quick to doubt yourself, Kyra...-You can read peoples emotions but somehow you miss noticing the amount of confidence I have in your potential" he mused in a sense of irony; "Believe in yourself more, Padawan".

Kyra Perl

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra squirmed, unconfident about many things, but intentionally using her skills in any capacity made her most nervous of all. If she didn't get this right... did that mean she was doomed? Would he get her kicked out then? Was this it for her? Her squirming picked up, her fingers picking at her cuticles as she failed to have any faith at all.

She had just accomplished so little. It would take time.

"Idunno..." She told him, her voice tight. "Maybe we haven't given meditation enough of a try?" No? It was worth a shot. Better than the do or die this suddenly felt like, the girl's eyes wide and bleeding her panic.

Kyra displayed her emotions like a book. It was so easy to displace responsibility when you're the youngest, or surrounded by friends. But sitting before Caedyn it was just him and her. And success in this? There was no dodging. She did, or didn't. It felt mildly world-ending to the emotion-ruled padawan.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"Kyra, if this works then we'll be able to use it for meditation and everything else as well" Caedyn pointed out. The fact that she suggested going back to meditation spoke miles for how self-conscious she'd suddenly become; Kyra Perl had so firmly argued and visibly loathed the subject of more meditation sessions, that it actually surprised him.

"Trust me, we got this..." Caedyn said, feeling more confident about the idea the more that they discussed it, despite his Padawan's reservations over it. "Get back to your feet and fall into stance. I'll open myself up some more and you can focus on reading me as we spar together" he suggested, soon moving back over to his side of the sparring mat.

His Lightsaber ignited with a sharp scream of crackling energy being expelled from the blade emitter, Caedyn looking over to his Padawan and giving her a confident nod. While he wouldn't drop his mental guard entirely, having seen just how largely she was influenced the last time they tried something of this sort, Caedyn did so enough for his emotions and mind-state to be on offer should she seek to reach out to him.

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra's gaze practically pleaded for him not to make her do this, her nerves raw and displayed for him to see clearly for the first time. She didn't like failing. She would rather fight, yell, and run then do what he asked of her in this moment. But he did not withdraw his request. He would not know what it meant for her to stand in that moment. The lack of argument he received would appear normal-- common place-- expected of any jedi padawan training under their master.

For Kyra, the decision to try and likely fail before him was abnormal. Her nerves radiated off her, more pressing than his own senses as he slowly lowered his guard. That was the difference between the two in that moment-- he merely existed, not expanding his senses past him. But Kyra let her emotions bleed into the air, touching him freely as he stood there unguarded.

She didn't want to disappoint him. The drive was so senseless-- so fear ridden-- her hands shook as she slowly raised her saber ... and failed to think past it.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

Caedyn studied her closely, and from what he could tell Kyra Perl was panicking within. It prompted him to want to sooth her anxiety, and the best way he knew how was to exert his presence more strongly within the room they shared.

A sense of calm and warmth would wash over her, now where she were so vulnerable to his persona, Caedyn's sense of ease would come alongside his compassion and faith that he held for his Padawan. There would be no expectations of failure, nor any fear that this would go awry; there was also no stress over him to succeed where they had otherwise struggled. Caedyn was simply focused within the moment, thinking of nothing else but the two of them and their training together.

"We will take this slowly, Padawan" he said gently to Kyra, "We'll start with what you have already seen of my technique. You go on the offensive and try to read my emotions, my thoughts and intentions. I won't strike back, I will simply defend myself".

 

[Kyra Perl]

The pressing urge to cry drifted away from her, his calm enveloping her like a warm wave. Ever since he pointed out the way she reacted to this, she'd been more aware of the moments it came up. In the back of her head she recognized the shift, but there was no resistance. Without his thoughts and experiences bleeding out on her this time, Kyra remained herself. Albeit, a calmed version, the shakes in her hands slowly leaving her.


Imagine the Sith recognizing this within her. The faint reminder brought her momentarily tenses, the fear of them sparking through his projected calm. And then the wrinkle smoothed and her breath managed to go even again.

She swallowed hard, slowly correcting her stance.

"Okay," Kyra croaked, not realizing the fear that had been shoved to the back of her mind. She hesitated, then pushed a careful step forward, following the footwork Yuroic had ingrained in her as she did a simple two-handed swing down from over head.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

It took a moment but things seemed to slow within Kyra Perl 's emotional state, thanks to Caedyn's efforts. She was able to find her calm while retaining her sense of self-awareness and individuality, causing the Jedi Knight to smile in approval. So far so good.

...-And then she began to follow his encouragement, moving on the attack with an air of reluctance. Even so, she moved in on Caedyn, bringing her lightsaber high up over her head and then down in a strong two-handed vertical strike.

Within Caedyn there was no cause for alarm or any panic what-so-ever, he seemed to react gracefully, stepping back while bringing his lightsaber across to batter her blade aside in his defense. Kyra would feel only his calmness, but also no sense of aggression or hint of an attack nor retaliation of any sort. Small steps to start out with.

 

[Kyra Perl]

His level response startled her, the girl stopping for a moment as if waiting for the rest to finally catch up and emanate off of him. She was more than familiar with Masters and their calm demeanor, but she hadn't fathomed it would really-- I mean not even a ripple. And here she was-- more than ripples-- unconsciously pulling back and into her own thoughts.

She took a quicker step forward, slashing harder-- this time trying to garner a response as she went off whim and slashed at him. He wasn't perfect. Watch and see!