Private Quiet in the Library

[Kai Bamarri]

Kai beamed. He liked that she liked him. It was good.

A woman walked past, carrying a box. She suddenly stumbled, wobbling a bit, and nearly dropped the container. Kai’s eyes flicked toward her, biting his lip. He watched her until she recovered and resumed walking.

<Projections?>

Distracted as he was, it took him a moment to realize what Aeris meant. Treating his appearance like a character creation screen in a video game? Huh. Maybe later. Right now, he was happy this way.

Still with his hands in his pockets, he shrugged, a grin teasing the corners of his mouth.

<It’s nice looking like Dagon. The guards go looking for me, sometimes they find me, sometimes they find the real Dagon.>

His sense of humor was developing nicely. Perhaps he had just eaten that woman’s wit.

Oh yes, he had caused her to stumble, her mind going momentarily fuzzy around the edges as he fed on her thoughts. He hadn’t even really thought about it, he simply did it on impulse, taking what he wanted. It wasn’t like he had done the woman any real harm… though he could do harm, if he lost control. But that wouldn’t happen unless he experienced withdrawal. His reward was worth tripping up a stranger: the intensely pleasurable high of a most potent drug.

The sharp uptick in his mood was difficult to hide. He walked with a slight bounce in his step now, a little less depressed at having to return to his room. For Aeris, perhaps it seemed he was simply happy to have made a friend—and that was true, though there was more to his jubilation than that.

Case in point: he spotted a rafter overhead a few feet away. For seemingly no reason at all except sheer energetic impulse, he sprinted toward it and leaped up to slap it with his hand. Twice as tall as the hall was wide, making the jump was no mean feat for an ordinary boy. Upon landing again, he turned around and bounded back to Aeris and her cart like a rambunctious puppy.

<Can I get a holovid projector in my room? To watch stuff? Play video games?> He paused, then quickly added, <And read books. I’ll read all the books. In the whole library. All of them.>

Aeris Lashiec​

 

[Aeris Lashiec]

Ooookaaaaayyyy... So that was a lot energy all of a sudden. Aeris looked perturbed for a moment as Kai came back before she eased up again and continued to push the cart along the otherwise relatively empty hallway. She shot a glance over her shoulder at the woman that they had passed. She wasn't familiar with their name but she had seen them. It'd be important to ask if something had happened. Just to be certain she was okay.

"Oh, uh--" Aeris cleared her throat. "Well, I would not know about that." She said and rubbed at her neck. "I have never been much for technology. Always prefered books and more hands-on things. You know, things like meditation and exercise. Only reason I learned how to use a computer was because I had to digitize the archives once. Easy to become a fast typer when each letter is forced to become hard-coded into your mind."

She waggled her fingers before her as if to write something as the cart pushed against her stomach.

"You should see some of the others though, especially the ones with more than just two arms. Or two heads." Aeris grinned. "The speed at which they processed these things were... Awe-inspiring."

"So hey," Her attention set on Kai. "If you were to be a Jedi, Kai. Just hypothetically here, what would you want to be? What would you want to do?"

 

[Kai Bamarri]

That wasn’t quite what he had meant when he asked if he could have a holovid projector, but he let Aeris talk about digitizing and learning how to type code. It sounded like a useful skill, though. He was almost tempted to eat her knowledge on the subject, but that wouldn’t be very polite. Aeris was his friend now, and he didn’t feed from his friends.

Her question took him by surprise. The mere idea of becoming a Jedi made him feel like he was going to explode.

<But I would want to be a Jedi.>

Oh, wait. He’d misunderstood.

<I don’t know what kind.>

As for what he wanted to do, he pantomimed slashing with an invisible lightsaber. This was no mere child’s play; at some point he had picked up actual knowledge of some of the lightsaber forms, apparent in his refined stance and technique. Since it was unlikely that Master Orsk or the other Jedi handling his case would have given him such instruction, it might come across as a little suspicious, or at least unusual.

<I would stop bad people from hurting good people.>

Aeris Lashiec​

 

[Aeris Lashiec]

It was poor phrasing. Aeris bit her tongue and hoped the situation smoothed itself out without her input, and to her luck it would seem that it did. At least somewhat. The kid understood that maybe she wouldn't be able to turn him into a jedi, or at least so it would seem. No doubt there was more going on in that head of his, but from the answers he gave it felt fair to assume that Kai had understood to some extent that Aeris didn't mean to turn him into a Jedi. At least, not yet. There was still a reason that he was in that cell and it was not in her place to question that until she knew more of it.

"Ah, that's very admirable." Aeris said and smiled at the faked out Dagon before her. Though given their ideas of what made a good jedi, perhaps they weren't all that different after all. "Being a Jedi is certainly some part being able to fight with a lightsaber. And you are right, your stance -- Shii-Cho -- is a..."

The smile on her lips faded for a moment, replaced with worry.

"It's a..."

"Where did you learn how to do that, Kai?"

Kai Bamarri

 

[Kai Bamarri]

Kai hesitated, eyes wide as he fished around for an excuse.

<The Holonet.>

Aeris Lashiec​

 

[Aeris Lashiec]

Aeris' head tilted a little, just enough to give the doppelganger a disappointed frown.

"Kai, please." She said and slowly nodded her head forward just the one time to urge him to be honest. "You know that I would never hurt you for telling the truth."

Kai Bamarri

 

[Kai Bamarri]

<I don’t know what you’re talking about. I am telling the truth. They have online courses now.>

He said, while cringing harder by the moment under her disapproving gaze.

Aeris Lashiec​

 

[Aeris Lashiec]

"Kai..." Aeris insisted.

Kai Bamarri

 

[Kai Bamarri]

He cracked.

<I took it out of somebody’s mind.>

His shoulders hunched up almost to his ears.

<It doesn’t hurt. But they forget it once I take it.>

Aeris Lashiec​

 

[Aeris Lashiec]

Oh. That was not what she had expected. A thoughtful frown fell on Aeris before she let in a deep breath and let out a slow exhale. The smile was back.

"Okay." Aeris nodded and continued to think on it. "Thank you for your honesty, Kai."

She continued to push the cart along the hallways.

"Do you have control over this or is it something that just happens as you meet people?"

 

[Kai Bamarri]

She didn’t immediately turn hostile at the news. His full-body cringe started to relax as she resumed walking and he followed along.

<I do it because it feels good.>

Aeris Lashiec

 

[Aeris Lashiec]

"Ahhh, and when it feels good you feel a certain increase in energy? Like, say, the urge to jump and hit a beam in the ceiling?" Her smile turned into a small smirk for a moment before she grinned completely. "I won't deny that I see the issue some might have with it. Memories are something we all treasure, even you."

"And from what I know, you haven't taken any memories from me yet." She ran a quick recollection of her day. Nope, seemed just fine. "Does anything happen if you don't do it? Take memories, I mean."

Kai Bamarri

 

[Kai Bamarri]

He made a stupefied face as she put two and two together.

<None of your memories.>

Kai frowned.

<I don’t feel good.>

Like so many of his answers, it was deceptively simple. He got across the fact that it was a severe addiction only by virtue of the imagery and emotion accompanying it. Visions of the vampiress who had attacked Dagon, a parasite and slave to her hunger, in whom he had seen himself like a darkened mirror.

Aeris Lashiec​

 

[Aeris Lashiec]

Addiction and withdrawal. Aeris would have liked to say she wasn't familiar with the effects, but that would have been a lie. The effects of constant war, of never ending wartime and strife took a toll that brought people not just to a place of darkness but a place of dependency. Everyone found crutches in one way or the other. Dagon had found his crusade, Aeris had found her books, but many others turned to more self-destructive habits that more often than not included some form of intoxicant. It was a pity but a grim truth.

"Then, together we better find a way to help alleviate that for you." Aeris said and nodded at herself. "I can't speak too much for what the others will or won't let me do, but everything that you are comfortable with telling me about this will allow us to help you find a way to control these urges."

"That is, if you want us to." Aeris gave Kai a look. "We can only help you if you want to be helped."

Kai Bamarri

 

[Kai Bamarri]

Though he knew Aeris had good intentions—all of the Jedi he’d met did—Kai’s mood began to blacken like burning paper at her words.

<No one has been able to help me so far.>

So how could she do any better? It was, if not insincere, then an unrealistic promise.

Perhaps deep down his reaction had as much to do with debauchery as it did that sense of hopelessness. Maybe he didn’t want to stop, didn’t care to be helped. It was even possible that he didn’t know what he wanted.

Either way, he fell silent for the rest of the way back to his cell, lost in his own thoughts.

Aeris Lashiec​

 

[Aeris Lashiec]

It pained her to see the way that Kai seemed to almost believe there was nothing that could be done. Maybe it was that idealist inside of her talking, but Aeris refused to believe that there was nothing that they could do to at least alleviate the downside of this addiction.

As they approached the cell, Aeris let the kid head inside first before she followed behind to deposit what they had picked out. There still wasn't much to be said and as Aeris turned around to leave she stopped herself halfway through the door.

"Hey, Kai." She said and turned around to give the kid one last smile before she left. "At least promise to stay in touch, okay?"

 

[Kai Bamarri]

Having helped to move the books from the cart to a small table in his little room, Kai looked up at the sound of his name. Sober and almost sullen, he seemed to have shrunk in stature, if not in size.

<Okay.>

He meant it, despite his foul mood. Aeris wasn’t the cause of his depression. She was still good.

Picking up a book, he found a relatively comfortable spot and settled down to read.

Aeris Lashiec​