Responsibility

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

The click of bottles and the 'Hear, hear!" echoed as they all agreed on that. Kaile flashed a smile, catching the green of Asmus's eyes as she felt his hand duck under to encapsulate her own. A slide of their palms brought forth the warmth of the friction of skin against skin, before their fingers fanned out and then slid to interlock.

She was tired. Honestly, she could do well with just resting for a bit. There were a few errands to run around while they all decompressed. Mai ended up without any injuries, but at least they now had some food. Taking the moment to take a sip of her drink, Kaile let her eyes wander to the rest of the crew.

How odd, how fast things had changed. How everything had moved so fast. Kaile never expected it to.

 

[Asmus Janes]

Zabrak food always featured lots of meat, cooked rare and plenty of spices. They didn't like sweet sauces and the meat was accompanied by light pulses that came spices or mashed into something that ended up resembling a fine grain.

Asmus recovered his hand with an apologetic smile and tucked in. Zabrak beer was also a welcome treat. Mai had even ordered that out if her own pocket.

Kairon spoke up after eating half his plate. "Best get some rest Asmus. I'm going to supervise them unloading but you'll be taking the next four hours and seeing us out and into space. Want you at the helm for a while in case anyone else is messing with the space lanes around these parts."

"Sure thing."

"And don't wake Kaile up to sit with you up front for goodness sake, she's been shot and needs her rest."

Asmus looked a little sheepish. The thought had immediately crossed his mind, but Kairon was right. He looked over at Kaile as he replied: "sure."

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

That prompted a small wry grin. No one had to be a Lorrdian to guess that had been Asmus's first thought. As much as she'd like to spend more time with him, after the ruckus, Kaile found some sensibility in taking a breather and resting. While she certainly did not want to be alone, after everything, they each had to take care of far more important matters.

It made Kaile wonder, after all of this, oddly enough, of Kurt again. Maybe because she'd likely been on death's door. Right at the edge of the Nine Hells. Her line of work was dangerous, more so than smuggling, and look where things sunk into. Finishing up her meal, she took another drink.

"I'll be happy to help out in any way." she added, glancing up to catch Kairon's eyes. "I'll be right as rain." they only had a day's ride to Denon after all.

Then she'd leave the Quinn.

 

[Asmus Janes]

[member="Kaileann Vera"]

The thump ran through the floor. Kairon frowned. "The Twins have got all overexcited now. If they don't stop dropping things we'll end up losing credits."

"They enjoyed throwing things far more than I expected," Asmus admitted as he leaned across the table. "I'll get some sleep now for a bit. Set an alarm for...three and a half hours?"

Kairon checked. "Four and ten."

"Alright then. Kaile, some cake?" He wouldn't be able to sleep after doing the second late shift. It would be there last few hours together for a good time.

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

"Just a small slice please." the cake was rather rich if she recalled correctly. Honestly, she wasn't sure if her stomach could take that much richness right now. While they were all decompressing from the chaos, she still was a bit off put by it. While they might have expected such a situation to happen, with her emotional roller coaster of experiences the past two weeks, it took a bit process it all. Not to mention, the belly twisting things that were going on when she caught Asmus watching her or when she happened to recall Kurt.

Things were still all too confusing.

A small plate with the requested slice was handed over to her. A smile and a soft, "Mighty thankful," shone to Kairon, and Kaile took her time again to enjoy her fill. The rest of the time for desert was filled with small chatter. Nothing too crazy. It seemed that all of them were not too much for talking as much as simply just unwinding. Before long, plates were scraped clean of chocolate frosting. Kaile stood up then, moving to gather the empty plates to set into the sonic.

 

[Asmus Janes]

[member="Kaileann Vera"]

Asmus helped Kaile get all the dishes and cutlery cleared away into the sonic. Then he briefly discussed their business with Kairon. Down on the cargo bay floor the droids were working with their customers to get their cargo unloaded and some extra items added to the roster. Kairon had managed to get the tariffs waived for the piss-weak security in the system and was taking full advantage. Routes out of the system had changed whilst the military combed the asteroid field for pirates.

Asmus took his beer from the table, looked to Kaile and headed for the ladder down. He played the game of holding the bottle by the neck with forefinger and thumb as he climbed down.

“I can go to a different room in a bit, so the alarm doesn’t bother you?” he asked Kaile as he opened the door to his room. He didn’t want to, not even slightly, but she had ended up getting shot on his account. He stepped into his room, placing his bottle down on the fold out table over the cabin bed. Lips twitched up as he thought back to almost this same moment the previous day. That was before they'd lost themselves in each other so thoroughly.

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

Kaile gave a shake of her head, moving it from side to side. Stray strands of strawberry blonde hair gave a little swish against her jawline. All half mused, still covered with the grit of grime and dry sweat. A hit to the refresher would be wise, but even Kaile felt too exhausted. Mulled by the booze and a full belly, she honestly just wanted to lay down.

Lay down and have Asmus there with her.

“It’s okay.” she told him, flashing him a weak, tired smile. “I don’t mind.” she added, standing up beside him as the door slid shut behind her.

“Be nice to just lay a while though.” together,that is. She had a fierce need for contact again. Maybe it was just the events of the day, everything coming back to her. It wasn’t mind numbing like before, but exhausting none the less.

 

[Asmus Janes]

[member="Kaileann Vera"]

"Yeah, until you get fed up of me apologising and kick me out," he joked softly. Asmus left his beer on the table and proceeded to get the temporary bed laid out properly across the floor. The frenetic energy they had succumbed to in the morning seemed to have been drained away by the days events. A hot and sweaty handball match would have changed things. Instead his need mirrored her own.

He slipped off his boots, socks and shirt and laid down on one side of the bed, expecting her to lie across his chest once more.

"Oh, hang on, which side should I go to keep your arm out of the way?" he asked, looking up and trying to figure it out in his head.

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

The shirt carefully went rising up over Kaile’s torso mid Asmus query. There were a few bruises visible along her slender frame, ribs still poking out a bit from having lost her appetite in her grief the past two weeks. A small wince drew over her lips at the slight sensitivity of her upper arm, the fabric sailing over her head and rumpling her copper hair.

“Reckon I can just rest on my left side.” she answered, dropping the soiled shirt onto the ground. The pants came next with a pop of a button and a hook of her thumbs, pulling them off along with her boots.

“It’ll be alright,” she assured him, setting down the rest of her clothing while she answered any further inquiries by sinking onto her knees on the makeshift bed and settling in along his right side, so her left pressed against him while her wounded arm would remain facing the ceiling.

Likely not the best smelling but honestly, it was likely the last thing on either of their minds. A deep, lingering sigh fell from Kaile’s lips, flowing over Asmus’s bare chest as she settled her cheek just along his shoulder.

“It’s your cabin,” she shut her eyes, slowly relaxing like a nexu cub curling close.

“Can’t kick you out.”

 

[Asmus Janes]

[member="Kaileann Vera"]

Asmus turned away when he caught himself watching her intently. He had mirrored her wince, but then his thoughts had drifted towards the memory of her soft press against him.

As she sighed over his chest he seemed to melt back into the sheets. His hand ran gently over her shoulder and across her torso. She'd taken more of a battering than him today, which still made him feel wretched. Logically it shouldn't have, but logic seemed to have passed over his feelings for Kaile.

"Would have liked a little more time with you today," he admitted. "And tonight. But I've got you now." His words were punctuated by a tentative squeeze, still wary of tagging on that burnt skin.

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

Settling in against him, Kaile found herself curling herself next to Asmus. She could hear the faint rumble in his chest when he spoke, feel the even rise and fall with every breath he took. The skim of his fingers along her arm sent a rush of goosebumps in their wake, a pleasant comforting sensation.

Half slit eyes fell open for a moment, letting the quiet seep into their bones. Time. There was never enough of it was there? It was fleeting. Funny, how it took this long for her to realize that in the past month. Nibbling lightly on the fullness of her lower lip, Kaile took a deep breath.

"This is okay." she admitted, turning her face to snuggle close, shutting her eyes anew. "I don't mind this." that brought along another faint squeeze, as if confirming it so.

"You alright?" her whisper soft voice lightly blew across his chest when she asked that.

 

[Asmus Janes]

[member="Kaileann Vera"]

“Right now? Perfect,” he sighed. There was a slight wiggle as he shifted into the bedsheets, revelling in the warm press of Kaile against him. It felt like a giant disconnect in the flow of the trip when he replayed the last few days in his mind. They’d spent so much time just talking and joking. The first day had seen her slowly open up to him, had brought his first glance at her smile. There had not been much time for idle conversation today. But they were still in one piece. She was still in his arms.

“You go tomorrow though,” he added, gently kissing the top of her head. It was hard to say it, but there was no reason to avoid the subject. “And I’ll miss you.” He had every desire to slide her gently over and make love to her, but not yet. Right now he was content to lie peacefully, trying to ignore the dull aches from the day’s troubles.

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

You go tomorrow though.

A slight tension came over the Lorrdian at that. Barely noticeable, but there. It was true. She would leave tomorrow, if no other surprises rose to detain them. A wave of melancholy crashed then. For a moment she mulled over the fact, half slit eyes barely opening to catch the faint glow of the room.

There wasn’t anything she could do about it. She had responsibilities to attend to. Nowhere else to go. As brief as this solace was in her sea of emotional turmoil, much like what had occurred with Kurt, it had to come to an end. Not only for her sake, but his. For the Alliance.

And I’ll miss you.

That brought a sting to her eyes, and she shut them tight as if to prevent the moisture collecting there to form. What could she say to that? The answer was simple. Honest. As truthful as she could afford to give.

“I’ll miss you too.”

 

[Asmus Janes]

[member="Kaileann Vera"]

Even if she couldn't see his lips curl up from when she was, she would feel the smile in the shift of his body. He pondered for a moment, unsure what he could say to that. That strange mix of joy and sadness was back again, painting the picture that was stronger from a broad palette.

Tentative, concerned for her wound, he extracted himself from under her and edged down the bed. He came to lie opposite her on his shoulder. His eyes expressed the heartache for their parting, but his lips still smiled.

"How much will you miss me...exactly?" he asked.

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

They lay pressed together. The shuffle entangling them ever closer. Her leg went sliding in between his, a bare thigh slipping close. Kaile could feel his breath fan over her face, tickling her with the stray strands of her bangs that went fanning along her jawbone. She could feel his gaze upon her, knew that if she opened her eyes, she would see the twinkle within the sea of green.

Even now, his question painted a picture of the scoundrel with a slightly cheeky glint within the depths of his eyes. That prompted a twitch at at the corner of her mouth. As much as it saddened her further. He didn't know. He didn't get it. Likely wouldn't even if she managed to tell him a segment of what truth she could.

How much would she miss him? Honestly, that was a question that Kaile wouldn't know the extent of then. She could only live in the now. In the precious time that they had. The espion couldn't fathom anything beyond that. No, she wouldn't know the extent of it until much later. Until the days had turned to weeks, weeks into months, and months into years.

How much will you miss me?

Such an easy question to ask. Far more difficult to answer.

What she did next likely wasn't fair of her. No, she knew it wasn't. Yet she did it anyways. Asmus felt the gentle cup of her hand against his cheek, the brush of her thumb along the high ridgeline of that aristocratic cheekbone. The curtains of her eyes fell open, and in that moment, Kaile simply let her gaze settle upon his angular features. The ghost of a smile lingered at the edge of her lips, but she didn't say anything. No need for words then.

Instead her hand went sailing from his cheek down to the nape of his neck. A small tug was really all it took, he wouldn't fight her. What manner of mischievousness lay within his gaze would fade, the reason for it only known in his mind. At least, for what thoughts could be produced as Kaile tilted up her face, the softness of her lips coming to rest against his own.

She kissed him, a coaxing searching motion of her lips for him to part his own. A deep intake of breath through the nose, the soft melt of a body against the other.

How much would she miss him?

That wasn't a question she wanted to think about. That was for another day.

Not here.

Not now.

 

[Asmus Janes]

His body was well used to four hour shifts of sleep and he woke up well ahead of his alarm. Lids felt heavy and the warm, the comfortable tangle of limbs was not conducive to getting up out of bed. She shifted against him to the slow rhythm of shallow breaths. For now he couldn't bring himself to peel her from him, but he managed to turn to look down at her. Her brow furrowed and she made a small, throaty noise of protest.

Tomorrow morning I'll wake up and she won't be here.

He repeated that thought in his head several times until it sunk in. When it finally did it was akin to being struck by a repulsor train. It wasn't the same thing to know something as it was the truly accept it. Asmus found himself looking around the room. It struck him that she carried so little. Just the clothes on her back, a few spares, a lizard and a sidearm. She travelled so light, but took her skills with her. Could get a decent living near any port with the way she could work with machines.

Eyes fell back upon her, elicited a deep pang of melancholy deep in his gut. She seemed so peaceful now. He soothed the pain by thinking back just a few hours, the hike of her breath against his ear as they finished the last steps to another slow dance. The way she'd looked at him as the warm flush slowly left her cheeks.

It hadn't escaped his notice that she avoided the topic of meeting up again. Easier to pretend it hadn't caught his attention and focus on the moment. What would cause her to do such a thing? Not for a moment did he think she had lied about Kurt, but that didn't mean the situation wasn't more complex. Or maybe with all the travel she was just a free spirited soul who didn't like to be tied down. Maybe he was worrying now for nothing. But it would have made everything feel a lot smoother if she'd just said ‘I'll give you a holocall in a few days.’

His lips barely brushed skin as he laid a kiss on her forehead. Kaile smiled and softly squeezed him with one hand before rolling over. Asmus took the opportunity to sidle out from under the sheets. Making as little noise as possible as he dressed. Taken back to her shock in the shower he decided that perhaps she just couldn't let it sink in herself, what she felt for him. Some circumstance she'd dodged that made it hard for her to accept.

Have I been selfish to let everything go this far so quickly? he thought as he lingered by the door. She probably just needed time. Time they didn't have. Still, there was plenty of time to go round and round in circles all alone on the cockpit. They weren't at Denon yet. Biting his bottom lip, Asmus resisted the urge to wake her up again just so they could share some more affection before the morning. The door slid shut softly behind him.

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

It was the soft scratching that woke her.

Chestnut brows pinched the bridge of her nose, a small grimace midst a face lingering with slumber. The scratching continued with little insistent noises that told Kaile that someone wanted attention. Bobo was awake.

“Mm...ahm up, ahm up!” she said with a slur, although the roll to her side and the lifting of the covers to her chin was not conducive towards getting up out of bed. There was a lingering warmth nuzzled in there, the faint scent of well-worn sheets and pleasant musk that would waft up her nose.

Although her eyes were closed, Kaile couldn't help the small upward curve at the right corner of her mouth. Kaile breathed in deeply, letting his scent linger in her lungs, seemingly encapsulating her whole. Their makeshift bed held only a lingering warmth from the scoundrel, but it was enough for the Lorrdian to find a fleeting sense of pleasure. Brief but for the dawning awareness that this would be her last morning on the Quintessence.

The curtains of her eyes slowly fluttered open, blinking away the haze of slumber and welcoming the pale light of the tiny cabin. Small bits of grit clung to the corners of her eyes, prompting a curling of a fist to rub them away. Scratch, scratch, scratch. Bobo would not be denied.

"Ahlright, ahlright!" Kaile cried, flinging the bed-sheets away from her torso, exposing her to the cold breeze of the air recycler. Goosebumps ran up her limbs, a pucker of skin along slightly bruised flesh and gloriously sore muscles. The languid stretch of her arms had them sailing over her head, the pointing of her toes along with a brief wiggle after that.

It was odd if she really thought about it. Or maybe it was that she didn't want to. Unlike before, there was no sense of panic; at least not immediately. No, what lay in the forefront of her mind was instead a profound sense of melancholy.

 

[Asmus Janes]

[member="Kaileann Vera"]

There was an eerie silence on the bridge as Asmus tapped away. The gloved he wore provided tactile feedback as he tapped away at the virtual holo keyboard before him. Kairon despised the things, but Asmus liked the way he could switch between layouts for maintenance, gaming or in this case programming.

After thirty minutes of going round in circles within his own mind he had managed to break the cycle and find something productive to do. It hadn't been easy. For a time he'd fanned the flames of anger directed at Kairon. Even though he would have been asleep the chance to slowly wake up with her one last time had been taken away. But that was unfair. It was simply hard to accept that they were nearly at Denon. Hard not to reply the last few days and realise how short a time it had really been. The morning felt like a daydream he could not wake from.

Then he had found something productive to do with that pent up energy. He tapped the compile button and watched as text scrawled across a display. When it was done, he hit run. A galactic map materialised in the air. Asmus zoomed in and rotated the view. Everything seemed to work as expected. A seperate program was already carrying out bug checks and corrections on the raw code.

Very carefully he drew out a route across the map. 'Files unlocked' appeared in red letters. Music started to play. Asmus grinned. The corrected code recompiled and he wrote it to a small chip which he tucked into his pocket.

It was simple. Kaile liked to travel. When connected to a system the little route finding tool used some of his own algorithms to either map a hyperspace route or connect to the holonet and find passage over public transport. Kairon wouldn't have permitted him to code in a few of their less well known hyperlanes, but he hadn't put in any of the really secret smuggling routes. On the disk was also a letter of recommendation digitally signed from the crew of Quintessence. Kaile would get work on a pretty wide range of freighters around the galaxy to carry out mechanical work based on that.

Asmus had put two hidden routines into the map. If one, as he had just done, draw out the route they had just taken or if Eriadu was a stop on the query it would decrypt the hidden media files. A playlist of all the songs they'd listened to on the trip so far. One would suggest Kaile was rethinking these days. The other was a longshot, but if she was planning a route that went past Eriadu she'd get a sudden reminder of her time on the Quin. Feeling quite pleased with himself, Asmus returned to monitoring the ship's systems and trying not to focus on what was ahead.

 

[Kaile Vera]

[member="Asmus Janes"]

Tiny little clawed feet went scurrying up her arm, familiar little pinpricks of the small lizard who had become such a precious part of her life. Most would consider pets to be temporary companions, sentient enough to know when they required food and water but not sapient enough to talk back. That wasn't the circumstance between Bobo and she.

No, as the tiny little Ysalamir perched himself upon her bare shoulder, Kaileann gave a ghost of a smile. A finger delicately ran along the crop of his head, following down the downy scales of his back. There, she'd scratch lightly with affection, receiving, in turn, an equal nuzzle along her neck.

Bare legs swiveled in place next to each other, feet rocking back and forth for a moment as the Lorrdian took in the tiny cabin. She bit her lower lip, sucking on the flesh in tentative contemplation. Thirty minutes had already passed, and the most she had done was slip a shirt over her head. There was an almost anxious lethargic weight to her every move. It was as if her body was attempting to delay the inevitable.

Kaile knew that she had to pick up the bedsheets and bedroll. However, doing so sparked a pang in her chest that just made her feel hollow. Swallowing hard, her shoulders rose and fell with a heavy sigh.

"It will be alright," she said aloud. Bobo cocked his head to the right, a curious glint in his beady black eyes. Another scurry, and he crept across the back of her neck onto her other shoulder.

Had she said that for Bobo's sake? Or was it for my own?

Her throat bobbed, and her lids fell. She bent down, right hand reaching down as fingers curled around the fabric. She rose a second later, going through the motions of folding it as neatly as she could. Kaile did the same for the next sheet, setting it down on the bed before plucking the pillows right beside it. The bedroll was last.

Her hand lingered there for a moment. What would come after this? Did it matter? The sensible part of her, the one who had come to terms with reality much like it had with Kurt, was already distancing herself. Images raced through her mind, poignant moments, ever so fleeting but so dear. Four days. That wasn't even a drop in the ocean of a full life. What happened here, would very well just be a fond memory.

Yet there was another part of Kaile, the one who wondered if there could be more. The one that was tempted to linger-- to delay her return to Sullust and the Big Guy. A deep well of loneliness spurred that on, fanned the flame.

"Idiot." she cursed herself, the image of Kurt's betrayed expression flaring in her mind. Pulling her hand back from the bedsheets, she straightened. I'm not myself, she told herself. You're just lonely, another voice said. It isn't fair, or safe, for him.

Before she could start circling that dark abyss of what-if's and maybe's, Kaile gathered her things. A trip to the refresher, one last sonic of her clothes.

Then in some hours time, she'll be gone.

 

[Asmus Janes]

[member="Kaileann Vera"]

"You alright lad?"

Asmus had been so lost in thought that he hadn't even heard Kairon step into the cockpit. His uncle was wearing a fresh set of clothes. A light blue-grey waistcoat over a white shirt. Another reminder their journey was nearly at its end; he only put formal wear on when he had meetings with a certain kind of client near the core.

"Yeah," Asmus replied.

Kairon grunted and took the chair next to him. He pushed a few buttons and pretending to check some instruments. "I thought it was quite funny at first," he said, clearly managing to overcome his stoic nature. "Saw you'd fallen for her and thought the girl was going to ignore you and give you a taste of your own medicine."

Asmus sat in silence, unsure if how to reply.

"Make sure you get her number or something eh lad? Not seen you pay attention to one thing for more than a few hours at a time before. Go on, I'll take over up here now."

"Ta," Asmus replied, bolting from his chair.

Kairon sighed when he was left alone at the helm. Apparently that was the best he was going to get from his nephew.